-mycloset-

September 2011

2011-09-04T17:10:00.000+01:00

Hi, i did not think I would post anything here but I feel...I had whined, complained, blurted out much on this blog and i would like say things here. at this moment.

i talked about him so much here and i'm not saying this because i have no one to turn to, but after all these months after the break up i bet people are quite tired if i carry on talking about him. recently, on friday, he surprisingly went to Nadzri's house, well with the so called nice F... i was thinking bout our times when i received the text and yeah somehow i felt weird.. i know i know, i am not over him, i am not over you... the least i can do now is to be okay and live my life. i'm trying not to think of you so much.. insya Allah with time...i can totaaly forget you.. i cannot cry the way i cried for you anymore. that is good... but somehow, not crying...it feels like the pain is stuck there somewhere.. i am doing better... i am... it is a good thing that i cry very little nowadays compared to those days when you made me upset... i should indeed be thankful that i ended it before we go even deeper.. before we go further... it's just... i can't help not to miss you sometimes... i can't help hoping things stay wonderful for both of us... i wish my mind has a delete button so i can erase the memories. those memories with you are what still holding me...

you taught me quite a good lesson... somehow...

somehow i just hope you do realize what have you thrown aside... i am not the greatest thing that could or have ever happened to you... and certainly i hope you won't think i am the worst thing that had ever occurred to you... but you just threw away one of the people who love you for who you are,who care for you, who gave you more than you give... the least i hope could happen so i'd be at ease is this...

2011-02-15T03:44:00.000Z

Salam and a very good morning. First of all, salam Maulidur to all Muslims :) Just feel like updating my blog for a while. I mean, really updating and not just expressing my feelings. lol.

It's 15th of February, 13 more days before it ends and just a usual hope, I hope February this year will be a meaningful one for me. February is indeed one of my eventful months. And I want it to stay that way and never change the slightest bit. I want it to be more and more precious as years go by. :)

Back to updates, Nini was admitted to JPMC weeks ago and she has been discharged now. She's staying at Usu and my family goes back and forth to see her. Once she is tremendously better, she can come home with us again :) I pray to Allah may she always in good condition and live longer. Amiin :)

Work; we have started on adult restorative since last January and honestly speaking I detested the first lesson. we were asked to make molars and premolars teeth out of porcelain. and being bad at carving thingy I just simply hated it. Thanks to Nadzirah and Cat for helping me with it. I appreciate that very very much! :) I got sick the day I started craving and I blame the carving session for it. lols.

I want to put exciting things here but i can't really think of any and honestly, i want back the positive and hyper spirit that i used to have and include in my posts once upon a time. lol. cause looking back at my recent posts I see me whining and pretending to be okay. I could recall the not so okay feeling during posting and typing those words. and i do not really like it.

What else...? Ahh, I am teaching again and already started my classes and for now I'd say I like my year 11 class more.

umm, what else? I don't know. think i'm done for now.

Good day people.

February, please, when you end, I'd think beautifully of you.

2011-02-11T03:51:00.000Z

The truths are:

I care.

I do not know for how long it would be.

Those warm and tingly feelings, I miss them.

I do not know what to do.

I cannot decide.

"Only dead fish go with the flow"

No matter how many times I told myself to expect less and nothing, I still do have expectations.

I love them.

Some of the truths.

Good day.

2011-01-17T18:39:00.002Z

It's 2 am and i could not get back to sleep. I feel...umm very much awake and i kind of feel like talking :)

Err, i think my nokia earpiece isn't working properly now. I think pasal tertindih kali. Oh well, biar tia :)

Okay, i am sure there's something in my mind that i could not get back to sleep. And i know what is that 'something' but i don't think i should say it out. Lol. Apa kan?

Umm, anyway, earlier as in yesterday, we had our second clinical session and alhamdulillah it was a lot better than the previous one. I had another two new patients and both were very corperative and easy to work with. And for this week i had dr lizah and noryagandi as supervisors and i indeed like being under them =)

January is coming to an end, i mean in plus minus less than 20 days? And on my way home tadi i was thinking bout teaching. I kind of eager to receive any call from Ahbab. ;) i miss teaching =)

My laptop isn't with me yet. And i kind of have given up hoping to get it any sooner. The sooner i'd get might as well be within a month? Well, a month sounds endurable than 2 months.

I'm yawning. That is a good sign. I am going to try to sleep now with earpiece on. Music had always been my lullaby once upon a time? Heh. Lols.

"It only felt quite good because letting bygones by bygones is indeed a good thg" =)

last but not least, i love mahmud zuhdi :)

2011-01-09T01:44:00.002Z

Randomness:

Happy new year.

Tomorrow i will be treating my first four patients and i'm nervous.

I haven't found any suitable or perhaps 'likeable' clinical shoes *sigh. I definitely need to find a pair later.

I miss my laptop. It has been a week plus. I am truly hoping to get it back somewhere next week before our first radiograph assesment the week after. O.o

I love the smell of my hair. If and if i'm not changing my mind, i may do digital perm for my hair in feb or march? ;)

I can wish but i have to know i don't necessarily get the things that i wish for. I wish certain thgs work the way i prefer but what power am i given to make such thgs possible? So yes, be realistic and care less. Care less, worry less, insya Allah that would cost me less trouble.

I think complicated and i make thgs complicated at times. And i apparently make some other people's lives difficult too. Hence i should, no, i am definitely learning to keep thgs more to myself. And show no signs how certain thgs affect me. I think so. I guess i need to learn bout the poker face thingy from Cat. Lol :)

If a person thought someone is standing on his way in doin something, i suppose that someone should stay aside?

Have a good day. :) or weekend..

Will be off for wed function and may be at usu's place for a while.

Action speaks louder than words.

You don't have to say it, it is just quite apparent which is which.

I'm not stopping anyone from doing anything. The least i can do is to know and remind myself as to where i actually stand. And to keep myself aside. It may not be too much, forgive me. But that is the least i can do.

Last but not least, i do not regret to have anything or anyone in my life.

Regret and defeat are two different thgs.

end of another year.

2010-12-29T17:15:00.001Z

Salam and hello. I have been neglected this blog for a month plus. no updates or whatsoever. and it just feels this is err the right time to do last post for year 2010? heh. Lol. I am pretty sure I won't be updating my blog any later than this ;)

We celebrated my sister 19th birthday earlier at Usu's cribs. it was pretty much simple and not truly surprising. well, my sister is not as gullible as i am to be tricked into surprises thingy ;p i bought cupcakes and flat shoes for her. we prepared some food earlier and i helped my mom in the kitchen and being me, clumsy and chaotic and truly bad with kitchen thingy, i indeed make few messes. the biggest one was i accidentally poured the Rose syrup all over the floor. wait, that is exaggerating. well. let just say 1/3 of the kitchen floor is covered with the syrup. mum was too tired to be mad. lol. my clumsiness and that chaotic behaviour somehow worries me at times. well, i know i do not literally realize them for most of the time and it is when i do i somehow feel.. kind of frustrated.

It's twooooo days before year 2010 officially ends. part of me, the dramatic bit, somehow considers about making very very good memories before the year ends. but at this very moment, with this kind of 'spirit' i pretty much do not really care. i, earlier, had these never ending plans and things to do before going to bed. i was thinking to have a few try on my ddr pad. i was thinking to clean up the mess i made in the kitchen once i got home. i was thinking to burn some songs to my cd. i was thinking to continue watching series. But I am just darnnnn sleeppppy. o.o

i think i will force myself at least have a few go on the ddr. i'd spend as much time as possible with my beloved laptop. before i'm sending it to the manufacturer to get fixed and repaired. haish. something is wrong with the speaker. it does not function properly. it gives that funny sound and yeah it needs to be fixed. lol. what a dull statement. and they gonna take my lappy away for at least 2 weeks? 2 weekkkss. lama jua tu! i'm sure it is gonna be more than 2 weeks. and hence i have to use my sis's laptop to do any work or assignments. and i cannot watch gossip girl, vampire diaries, glee, etc etc. never mind, i'd get indulged with harry potter i guess. oh yes, i have been rereading harry potter again. actually i was only planning to read the last book but i got irritated when i could not recall most of the spells and info so yeah i started back with the first book! i know i can just google those things but still it would not feel the same. reading and to get into it is more preferable, for me at least :) I'm almost finished with the fifth book. among the seven books, i dislike this one, order of pheonix, Sirius Black got killed which i apparently think could have been avoided if only Harry did not just keep away the magic mirror Sirius gave him with intention of trying to save Sirius's neck from danger. okay, i haven't reached to that part. would i get less mental when i get back to that part again?

Okay, enough with Harry Potter. :) umm, what else. okay, tomorrow i obviously need to go to bandar again and i somehow do not feel like going out tomorrow. ;0 i must go to few necessary places tomorrow. i should not procrastinate doing things. i'm quite an expert in procrastinating and procrastination is truly bad :)

What else? ahh, i miss salsa. see i actually planned to join salsa again in early dec. well, i did not foresee that exam would only end by mid month and then i was away for few days for vacation and i don't think auntie dayang is available atm. i bet she is quite busy with new year thingy. hence i'm glad i got ddr pad to be the substitute. siggh, to bad my laptop gonna be away forrrr such a long time. lol.

mentioning about trip, i don't know. i somehow got some wake up calls? after it? vacation was okay. i wished i had more time and brought more cash during the trip. anyway, that was not what important. when i said calls... well there were few stuffs that made me realize few things. i don't know how to put them in words here. well, i can think of the words. i just don't feel like mentioning them here. for i'm afraid if i say them out, it'd change the way i think. but yes, i somehow hold on these stuffs to prevent myself from..err, changing my perspective? lol. i'd just say i learn few basic things out of those few environments. :)

things to look forward for next year? umm... Salsa~~~!!! and teaching! i am offered to teach again next year and yesss i am taking that offer. :D with a yes from my mum and him, mzk :) i know next year gonna be a tough semester. what with thesis, more lectures, exams and we are starting our clinical next year, but still, i think teaching would ease me. i just hope the students are as good as the last ones ;) i'm not gonna take as many classes as i did last time, that would be committing suicide. heh. lol. i just want to teach on thursday night and on friday :) i hope they can agree with that condition;) amiin. anyway, clinical. truth be told i am not quite ready... huhu. i seriously need to get used to the sights of blood. before i had my leave, we were doing some assisting work in the clinic and may dear... the sights of profuse bleeding got me nauseous. i enjoyed learning but blood, heh. well, i've made this choice, and i must not look back. i know i love bio and chemical thingy better but let just stick to medical side okay? :)

Alright, i obviously have talked a lot. i better stop. :)

Good night! :)

Just in case i indeed do not post any last update before the year ends, well, i wish you all happy new year. and may 2011 may be a better year for all of us. :)

2010 is quite... i don't know. :)

Turn 21!

2010-11-12T07:11:00.000Z

Salam and Hello peeps. I am quite sleepy and i feel like cuddling in my bed. Friday is my cuddling day I suppose. Lol. Anyway, i wanna update my blog that I am at Usu's house with free wifi at the moment. Lolness.

Anyhow, I would like to thank to everyone who greeted me on my birthday. I appreciate and love all the greetings. :) Once again, I thank C3 for the surprised cake, gift and card :) I had a nice time on my birthday. No big celebration on that day but I am truly grateful to spend the night with my beloved man, Mahmud Zuhdi a.k.a Mr K:p Thanks for staying with me till the clock hit 12 :) And thanks too for the gifts. I love them. simply :) I pray may you have a safe and nice trip in Jakarta :) imy :)

Next, uummm, I get in touch with a friend and I am truly glad that we are somehow cool :) We even plan to meet up someday, most probably after exams and tests thingy? hee. I like that :) admittedly, keeping aside all the arguments and crisis I do miss having certain people in my life :) And this friend is one of these people :) i like it when we talked as if nothing ever came up between us. burying the hatchet feels good. it is indeed a good thing. :)

Tomorrow night I am not going to join my fellow ex school friends after all. my family is going to gather at Usu's house tomorrow. Tehee. I want spend some quality time with my family. :)

Think I am done talking for now. Good day people.

-zy19-

advanced 21st.

2010-11-06T16:28:00.001Z

BIRTHDAYS:
It's 7th Nov 10, happy belated birthday to Faizal aka Pak Ijal. May Allah bless thee with happiness, success, longevity and prosperity with beloved wife^^, thanks for the pizza treat and the marvellous carbonara made by his wife, sis Ruby. I also thank C3 family for the surprise advanced birthday cake and gift earlier. That was totally definitely unexpected. :D i totally like the night gown u guys get me. Hehe. So I guess i unofficially turns 21st already? 3 days in advance? Lolness.;)

AOB:
It doesn't feel good to turn down people when they were counting on you. I'd be glad to do certain things for the sake of old times. But i can't. The feelings are somewhat feel more sucks when it appears to be..well,it seems like the biasness isn't worth it. True, i am indecisive. A lot of time, I am.

Certain of the acts bother me because i wish they were... Well,never mind.

Alright, enough talking i suppose. Im off.

Again,thanks C3 for the pleasant surprise. xoxo

Cautious. Yep.

Goodnight.

Narnia

2010-11-05T13:48:00.000Z

Salam. Hi. Alright, I want to reread Narnia books again. I wish I have the books with me. I wish I can get every single copy of the book. the old version. not the compiled one. Hmmph. I especially love the fifth book, the voyage of the dawn treader. i never got bored reading Narnia books. And I think I pretty much enjoy the movies as well. Usually there are bound to be disappointment when a book is made into a movie. like the twilight saga and even some of the Harry Potter bits. But Narnia. I totally enjoy the books as well as the movies. The characters kind of fit and match with my imagination? Hehe. The four siblings. Aslan. the white witch. the talking animals. Gahh. I miss reading the chronicles of Narnia. ReallY :'(

Alright, what else is there I wanna talk about? Hmmph, I don't know. lol. I went out with my cousin today. I basically feel kind of fresh. i think. but not totally 'refresh'. Constant Salsa would do I suppose. I am so looking forward for Salsa. There are things I kind of hoping would take place. I am thinking of holidays or vacation anyway. But I need not to think or hope much on vacation. For one thing we need to get through exams first before any leisure moments. but yeah I'd commit suicide if I do not get the best of time during the semester break. Lol. Exaggerating much ;) But yeah I am counting on Dec to have a good time.

What else? Umm, umm, tomorrow is Faizal's birthday and he is treating us Pizza (delivery) and we are buying cake and a gift for him. Somehow cannot wait to see his reaction on receiving the thoughtful gift :p And tomorrow night I might meet a friend. A friend who said has been missing me. I should see that friend for the sake of friendship. I suppose so. I haven't really confirmed it yet :)

Hmmph, I am pretty much idea-less now. I mean I might just end up mumbling if i start talking so yeah. i better stop. read a book i suppose. or just straightly get into bed :)

So goodnight and I hope tomorrow would be a good day. oh yeah talking about day, it has been rather a pack week for us. assignments. test. revision. teaching. tiring much but i somehow like it :)

i will learn slowly i suppose. no, i must. if it is to be it is up to me?

2010-11-02T17:15:00.000Z

Salam, it 12.33 AM already and I just finished doing my Dental Histology assignment. Wait, I am not totally done with it. I haven't included one tiny detail and I will insert it tomorrow morning? Err. Yeah. I tried to finish it asap so i can blog before going to bed. Lolness. I am not so sure what were the things that I pretty much and desperately want to put here. Right. I am just quite tired to put too much detail at this very moment. Okay okay, I should really get to the point :)

I love this kind of productiveness. somehow. staying up late doing something really productive :D Not just that it takes my mind off things but it makes me feel good. somehow. :) This kind of times somehow... I don't know. It just makes me feel good. and somehow useful? Lol. I feel like I am seeking for something i have left behind? Did not i feel like this a lot back then? Back as in a year or so ago? Six form time? Yeah. Kind of. I somehow tend to automatically recall things in the past when I feel like to. I mean it just occurs out of sudden. I dwell into the past. I think a lot. true lot and parts of those thoughts that i have might actually are not necessary? i know but i could not help it. :)

I know very well that I am quite transparent. as in I cannot lie well, i cannot pretend well. I cannot hide my reactions well. i am pretty much expressive, i think. but somehow i cannot help wondering, does anyone really know me in particular? i guess so. but at times i feel like no one truly knows me well. i suppose this assumption comes out when people don't or can't get what i am trying to say or what is that i want. i can't blame them because i myself cannot be sure what is that i really want at most times. i think complicated? i suppose judging on few 'testimonials' i could not agree less. or more. lol. i am not proud to be complicated, difficult, selfish or etc etc etc. i am tactless at times? like i should think before i say out things? sigh. okay, confession. I HARDLY say NO to people. I do not feel right to say no to people without even trying or putting some effort to give whatever it is that they want. i thought i was just being nice with this kind of behaviour and i did not see that this actually may make things becoming even bad? i wish i can say no to people at times but then.., bla bla bla. out of ten occasions i only manage to say NO like...umm 3 out of 10 situations?i easily feel dejected or rejected when i feel like people do things for me out of their willingness. like the moment i got the slightest bit of hints that i am a burden, i... i automatically back myself off. everyone wants to feel as if they are needed. but then if people do not truly want us should we stay and bug them? i think not.

i am not totally being rejected. no, i am not. but before i got fully rejected, i should take early caution right? i wanna stay on the safe line and i am not sure how i am gonna do that. one of the things, i need not get angry or mad. or resented. getting upset is okay. plus it is unavoidable. and i am not saying this as if i am taking that no one appreciates me. no. of course there are :) just for particular today, i am thankful to have those who feel me. i know i can over react at most of the times. for one thing i cry pretty much easy. well, a friend once said it is one of the ways to express emotions? lol. when i am really mad i end up crying. when i am really happy i end up crying. so for good or bad reasons i just cry. silly much? no comment. :)

at times i keep things to myself and did not blurt it out to some particular people because..well, for one thing, things that we say can change the way things are badly? and in the end i'd regret for saying those things out.

Alright, I should be getting into bed now. tomorrow gonna be a 'heavy' day. Dental histology and skeletal system? i'd surely need enough rest to keep up with tomorrow lectures :)

i really hope when i wake up the next day i'd feel better. not that anything bad did really happen but still, i wanna be.. well i'd just keep that last part to myself.

goodnight earthlings. :)

2010-10-28T06:00:00.000+01:00

I tried to get some nap just now but to NO avail. I'm quite pissed. I'm fasting and I know I shouldn't be marah2 or whatever but gahh, I'm quite annoyed. I bought an original casing for my phone last night and I got it put on at Mobility shop at the Mall? And I didn't know that I had to pay $15 for it and it turns out that $15 mcm not worth it pasal the Indian worker just just...err what is the word, come onnn! He hurt my phone. LOL. It cannot slide up adn down properly and I am definitely bringing it there later. With this definitely not giddy mood, I am glad to have someone to snap at I guess. Lol.

Okay, this is not good. I hate this aura or persona. I totally hate it. Okay, positive thoughts. umm, I had a good time with Syam, Nadzirah and Farah last night? We went to K box while waiting for my phone siap and instead of singing me and Syam kinda got a bit high and we did a bit of Salsa thing? hehe. That was fun :) I miss Salsa a lot and yes I am seriously thinking to attend Salsa class tomorrow? Alright, if ada Auntie Dayang going to Salsa definitely! :D

Later I am thinking to watch movie with my siblings or maybe treat them dinner? Maybe watch The Rise of Mummy?

I can't really think straight at the moment and avoiding might be an ideal way not to make things any bad :) I wanna be stable :)

Okayyy, I am mumbling much. I better be off and start revising?

Good day people :)

2010-10-17T15:32:00.001+01:00

I wanted to blog using laptop tadi kalinya lagging berabis! Haha. Mental ku. Hehe. I gave up. Buang credit ku mereload balik2. Haha. Okay, I'm gigitan tapi kan ketawa. Lol. Yes. I am going crazy. Something is definitely wrong with my mind:p HEHE.

Aigo. I forgot. Salam and hello again people. Hee. It's almost 10 and I wanna talk before I'm going to bed. Alright, i know i started off pretty much grumpy this morning and now I am so not grumpy. Anddd the courtesy goes to my sister, Siti Yuhani. Seriously, it is just always good to get her snipping at me. She got mental with me easily. I had a good time laughing at her annoyance. Tehee. :p

Alright, just few few updates bout this week. I went out with Elza,Zar and Vivi last thursday. It had been quite a while that I haven't seen them. Hang out pun lamaaa. Except for Elza. I went to Fifah's house not long before. We watched Jangan Pandang Belakang Congkak 2 anddddd it was disappointing. I prefer the first one a lot lot better. :/ elza treated us dinner at hotpoint that night. Tehee. Thanks Za and congrates again for the award:D I went home with Zar since we both now live in the same kampong. :p it was nice talking to her. I rarely see or spend time with her yet it is never awkward to see her. Haha. Apaan:p

The next day I woke up early with Ka Far. We were to attend Preconvention Symposium at MOF auditorium. I really think the symposium interesting and beneficial. Like the ad and disad of usage of amalgam? Biodentine? Truly beneficial. Hope they would organise it next year. And and we really think Miss Mabel cute and I really like Mr. Wilson. Too bad he is no longer one of those profs who'd be monitoring our progress. Pfft. Anyway, after the symposium me and farah decided to watch movie while waiting for he bf to send her uniform to her. And he unplannedly brought us to dinner with his cousin :) me and farah watched Child's eye btw. It was nice tho ending ny kambing. Typical ghost story ending. Heh.

What else what else? Ahh. There is something else. Huhu. See, today Dr Sam actually invited us to come at her sister's place for doa selamat function anddd majority of us couldn't make it. I'd love to but I had a class tadi. And I couldn't switch the time. Pfft. And and my friend ckp dr sam mcm hoping and expected most of us would have been there. It does not feel good to disappoint people that we like and get along well. I know how it feels...

Alright, I'm yawning already. Kind of. Lol. Think I'm off to bed now. Goodnight people. Hopefully next week be a good one for us.. :)

just a lil morning talk.

2010-10-17T03:27:00.002+01:00

Hello,salam. I was awake hours ago. Quite early. And I did feel good remembering few things. That was a nice initial start. But now, the good sense is fading. Haaa. I wonder whether I indeed have some sort of personality disorders. Is there such thing as emotion disorder? Sigh. I love it when I feel happy and giddy like nobody's business. Lol. Who doesn't?

Okay, okay. Now i'm quite certain that I have emotion disorders. I am now smiling. Tehee. Scarry much. Hehe. A simple text just got me smiling just now. It is not special. Not from anyone special yet it makes me feel good out of sudden? :p see, it is not difficult to make me happy. Or to get me smiling. Not a hard job buddy. Lol. Easy to please. But then, it's easy for me to get upset. Well not all the times. It only gets worse when it comes to people whom I feel more deeply? This includes family,friends and..well him :)

If I am given the chance to turn back time would I take it? Well, I would have said yes,usually. I indeed wished a lot that I could go back and change few few things. But then to think about it now..there are nothing much I'd change. I've learnt not to live in the past and get move on with life. Again, to dwell into the past is completely useless. Pasts are memories. And perhaps lessons? Lol. I used to regret knowing some people and to make some decisions and now I see that those unfortunates are reminders and experiences? Alright I'm mumbling. :)

There are few things that bothering my mind actually but I just do not know how to put them in words and blurt it out here. I pretty want to say it now and i think its gonna be a way 'random'. First of all, I don't know for real but I just feel like I'm a...er bad person or selfish? I know I'm not the bestest person, daughter, sister or friend. But I care. Sigh. I've practiced this do-not-get-attached-easily quite well that I somehow feel like i accidentally practice it on my family? I am rarely at home and I do things on my own. I'm not saying I'm independant. No. I'm not. I still rely a lot on my mum. I'm saying this crap because..well, i feel quite bad and somehow sad that I feel a person points this out to me. I prefer it to be direct and not through sarcasm or comparison. Some sarcasm I don't really mind and would do my best to ignore them tho dey do feel ouch. But making me feel like a unreliable family member that is quite..suck..i'm not mad. No i'm not. It just got me thinking and it makes me feel suck..

Another thing I'd like to clarify is..before pointing our fingers on other misbehaviour,change or anything.. We should at least reflect ourselves first. If a person suddenly keeping a distance,for me, I would think that I might have done wrongly to him or her,might have said offensive things to them instead of jumping to conclusion that person doesn't want to be around with me anymore. :)

Alright. I think I talked a lot already. I better stop before I go on talking bout unappropriate things that might upset people. I wanna get up and watch tv or something. :)

Have a good day people.

10.10

2010-10-10T12:31:00.000+01:00

Hellooo, salam. HEHE. I feel kind of good and giddy. hehe. kind of. usu and kaka nurul dropped by this afternoon and we are going to have family dinner on next Friday. eh wait, i mean, next two weeks. on the 22nd that is. kaka nurul will treat us on that night. venue: wecan restaurant. i don't have problems with the food and i so suka the environment. so home-ish. lol ;)

Anyway, it's 10th October 2010 today. lots of people are talking about how special today is and blablabla. well, it is. it's once in 1000 years? i saw that on facebook. anyway, admittedly the date today sounds pretty much special and very fortunate to those who decided to get married today. lol. very lucky the babies that are born today. hehe. and honestly, though i don't have anything extravaganza today but still, i feel somehow good. there is no one particular or specific that i should be thanking to for this goodie feelings but yeah i feel kind of good. haha. lol. and yesterday i was thinking to commit suicide due to boredom:P ironic indeed.

I woke up around 8ish today and yeah i did feel slightly grumpy but then it didn't last long. i suddenly had that vision of myself going out and having a nice and pleasure breakfast somewhere. hehe. i had a little morning chat with my cousin and that too kind of made me feel like smiling. anyways, i initially just wanted to go and get my things in Tutong town but then i unplannedly went to Gadong to get something there. tehee. i know i did not have to get it today. i can get it like tomorrow? but then i just felt i needed to get it today. well, I wanted to get it today itself. so yeah, i went to bandar on my own :) if i were not having any class tadi patang i might have as well stay longer.

Umm, what else? oh yeah, i need to prepare my teaching materials for tomorrow. somehow i feel like doing some reading on the hygienist book. yeay, productiveness :D

Alright people. few more hours before the weekend ends so yeah, appreciate it :) this day only comes once in thousand years. haha. lol. May next week be a better week :D ahh, one exciting thing? outing with the girls on coming thurs? teheeee.

take care, xoxo

bored.

2010-10-09T11:59:00.001+01:00

I'm bored. I am bored. I am freaking bored. I am feeling gloomy and I am BORED. gahh. This boredom might as well kill me. I'm bored with my blogskin and I want to change it. And I don't know when I can do that. I want a new one. Something different. Something colourful. That might brighten my mood and somehow inspire me to blog and do it positively. All I do is whinning these days. I am getting bored of it. I'm getting bored with things. I want some change. Siggghhhh.

Life is not at stake anyway. Things are not so bad. My training course is okay. Started doing scaling on phantom head weeks ago. Things at home are pretty much normal. Yet i feel incomplete. I wanna do something interesting, fun and and i don't know. I really feel bored. Ever since this afternoon the word 'boredom' keeps on tuning in my head and it's driving me freaking insane. I know I sound dramatic but at this is very point I just do not freaking care.

I miss Salsa. I might as well get some work out moments with music later? But again to do it alone is just plain boring. Gahh. Alright, I need to do something later. Finish my assignments? But then aku malas. Dvd? Boringgggg. Series? Gossip girls annoying ah. LOL. whatever it is I'd do something later. Anything. And I'd cool down. I won't feel like committing suicide anymore later. LOL.

I sound very very much dramatic. Self centred? Selfish? I know I am only thinking bout how I'm feeling saja at the moment but then I think I at least do not ask anyone to sort me out. I at least do not give that burden to anyone. At least I just wanna be alone and I don't go around and bring people down with me. I do not blame or accuse others. So I think I at least deserve some right, though very little, to get excused to behave in this kind of manner.

Alright, i think i better stop before I start dwelling into the past. Past is past. And i couldn't bring any moments in the past back. I hope my next post would be brighter and more positive than this. I seriously hope so.

Have a good weekend people. T

2010-09-27T23:51:00.002+01:00

The ways we behave and the words we say, they could hurt others not just a bit, but a lot...

Updates :)

2010-09-24T04:24:00.000+01:00

Okay, here it is. I am not sure how to begin my post. LOL. I meant to update my blog like days ago? week ago? Tehee. Anyway, salam and a very good Friday morning to you. Well, I do hope it is gonna be a good Friday. LOL.

Alright, I might as well start with Raya updates. It's the 3rd week or Raya, umm wait, is it 3rd or still 2nd week of Raya? huhu. lol. I am not quite sure. hence this somehow shows how not quite 'committed' or 'excited' I am during this Raya. LOL. Raya isn't that bad. It isn't. It is okay. Okay, I am not sure how do I feel about Raya. I feel indifferent. Forgive me, but it feels like... it is just an occassion. I don't really feel so special about it. I did kind of picture Raya this year gonna be special. yeah, somehow. but then, truth be told it's quite... err plain? It was not totally boring but... okay okay, I am mumbling now. Perhaps my current mood contributes to this less enthusiasm for Raya. :) Anyway, I went to Miri to visit Aunt Diah last Friday? Eh, last two weeks, with family. Abang Anip and Zuhdi joined us too. It was nice to see Aunt Diah and spend some quality time with beloved people :) The next day I went raya-ing with Zuhdi at KB. it was something different. well, quite. Anyhow, I really like Ami, Mr Zam Kaderi's daughter. :) I did have convoy moments with my fellow friends. It was nice but there were not lots of us. I'd say it was different from last year. For one thing, Eham was not there with us. *Sigh. I see very little of him. we all do. Wait, we hear very little from him and in fact I never see him anymore. Well, Eham though you are not reading this, we miss you buddy :)

Another thing, something good out of this Raya is that... I think I pretty much buried the hatchet with a friend. I used to think that it is a fullstop for us but I am truly glad that things turn out to be better than I thought :) Though to get back to the old times sounds a bit impractical to do. this is good enough. my point is, we are letting by gone be by gone. :)

What else? Ahh, I'm having my OSCE in less than 2 weeks time. And yeah, I should be freaking out by now considering there are lots of things to be covered. I need to revise Dental Anatomy and General Anatomy pretty serious. Hence, shopping plans and any other leisure outings are to be postponed after 6th October 2010. Lol. But really!

What else? Umm, random; I'm fluctuate. I think so. I change my mind quite easily and get influenced easily. lol. Anyway, this lately...I think i am quite lost? and there is something nagging me but i could not truly identify it and hence I barely can work it out.I don't feel like sorting myself out. I am not sure what is wrong so yeah. Plus I am having this OSCE coming so soon so, I know better which one should be my priority at the moment :) Someone commented to me that I haven't changed a bit. well, it was a random statement, I think so that person didn't really mean what he said. I think but yet, it keeps on tuning in my mind. How can he think that he knows me better than I do? I am not mad. It just occurs to me :) Or what if he actually does? Okay, I am making such a big deal out if this .Lol. I just got this issue of not knowing how do I actually feel or want that I take people words into account.:) Emotions and rationality barely get along well.

Alright I think I have talked much. I better stop :) Have a good day people :))

Simple yet complicated.

Few days to Raya ;)

2010-09-07T02:54:00.000+01:00

Hello, Salam :D I was just doing some research for my assignments just now. I kind of want to get things done before Raya. Oh yeah, Raya, soon. Like 3 or 4 days to go? Tehee. Umm, I am not sure how do I actually feel about this coming Raya. I just feel a bit good because it is an event? Like something to look forward for? Though I could not actually foresee any kind of extravaganza stuffs going on during Raya. Well, aside from convoy with family and friends? And Raya with him. Okay, lemme rephrase my perspective. I am not so giddy about coming Raya but then I just hope things would be nice and smooth during this Raya. Not just for me but for everyone. :) It is gonna be another Raya without our beloved Dad. Al-Fatihah to him... May Allah blessed his soul and ditempatkanlah roh nya di kalangan org yg beriman. Amiin. We miss him and alhamdullilah lives are getting better. Life isn't perfect yet I think my family is doing okay. There are some things that..err..umm, not the good good or nice ones? but then what matters is we can cope.:)

What else? I am quite grateful at the moment. I mean I am now sort of sure about something and I really pray to Allah to let things go smoothly :) I had two good consecutive times ,on last Saturday and Sunday that is, with Mahmud Zuhdi :) I love you:)

Errrmm, I think I should stop here, I gotta get back to my assignment :)

Have a good day people :)

happy 22nd Birthday Love :)

2010-09-01T14:32:00.000+01:00

"it's 1st September and I'd like to wish my beloved man a happy 22nd Birthday :) This is like the fourth greeting already? though i don't think he is reading this :) Anyho, I pray for your happiness, longevity and prosperity. May you would achieve success in everything you do. Amiin amiin Ya Rabbal Alamin :)
I hope I did not spoil your day with the KB thingy. It was my bad. I'm sorry.

I was really happy to receive an unexpected call from you this morning. I have missed you so much.

I love you. "

General blogging:

It's less than two weeks for Raya and I feel like... time flies so fast. I tried to recall things that I have gone through and things that have been taking place so far and most of them I prefer not to recall. Truth be told, I seriously feel I am soo.. what is the words? umm, I change my mind easily? no, not easily. Indecisive. yes. That is the best adjective to describe me. I kind of have made up my mind about something. something that somehow would tear me inside but for the sake of 'self-defense' i pushed my self to be so determined about it. but then, truth be told, I am never ready for such decision. it is not something I would like to do. it is not my dearest wish. i just thought of it based on rationality. i thought i was really determined. determination can only be achieved if nothing can affect one person's decision. sighh. i cannot decide.

okay, enough whining. it does not feel any good. umm, lectures today were..okay and quite interesting. i actually laughed sincerely during DK Jr's lecture today. Dk Jr was not so mean today. seemed to be in a good mood. lol. i would not take that for granted next week. lol. Dr Yati, she is truly adorable. no kidding. it is almost impossible not to like her. Banar. :) DK didn't talk much today. I mean she is a bit serious today. we somehow funnily fear her. heh. she is okay. just a lil strict? hehe. last week lecture was kinda hilarious.and admittedly fun ;)

What else? Umm, on this coming Sunday as I mentioned before I am going out for Sungkai gathering with some school fellows. Original plan is to join for bowling with them but Zudi is inviting me to go to a seminar with him. And I invited him to join us during the Sungkai. I hope he won't cancel on me. I know better not to be so sure but again, I cannot help myself not to hope.

Okay, what else? Ida is bringing me to join her friends for Sungkai tomorrow and actually invited me to sleepover at her Aunt's house. I am not so sure whether i can make it. something is wrong with my car's brake. seriously, i never truly like cars. i don't prefer to get bothered and spend on car thingy. i don't find it worth my money. lol.anyway, usu most probably would sort it out by tomorrow. so, i'll see. at least i can accompany Ida having sungkai?

Umm, I think I am pretty much idea-less now. Till here then? Goodnight and may tomorrow be a better day. No, let September be a month full of happiness and nice moments? I am counting on that. -__-

Caio.

"the thing is, i can only see him, no one else"

Gathering and Gathering ;)

2010-08-28T15:11:00.001+01:00

Salam and hi peeps, I am blogging again. hehe. I guess blogging does help in some particular ways. lol. I am not even half way and I already talk nonsense. lo'ol. ;) Okay, I am quite tired and I wanna watch some dvds I just bought yesterday so I will do my best to keep this post straight forward and quite brief? err, I hope so :)

Alright, first of all, I want to blog about surprise birthday gathering on last Tues, 24th August, Silah's birthday. Bobeh made a surprise plan for her beloved Juliet and I technically had a wonderful time on that night. Well, we all did. A night full of laughter. Seriously, when was the last time I had a good laugh with my school mates? That felt like ages ago. lol. It was truly endearing to meet some of the Sci1 Utd girls. Fadhil, Mirus and Nadz were there too. And Mayyer's boyfriend jua :) We went home pretty much late that night. I initially planned to stay only up to 9ish PM but I only got home at 11 ish? So much of worrying bout Anatomy test on the next day. Oh yeah, before I forget, I seriously dislike that Doctor teaching us this particular subject. She's...urghh. No offence. lol.

Next..ummmm, cohort 3 had Sungkai session yesterday. Celebrated Cat's belated birthday tarus. Dr Sam and her family joined us. And yes, we had a good time indeed. I was hyper. like totally hyper and yes it was weird. They kept on asking me whether I am truly okay or not. Well, I could have kept the act if I didn't break down for few moments last night. sighh. Anyhow, I am really thankful to them for not judging me *if they do they at least kept it to themselves very well* and making me laugh. Especially Syam :) Seriously, he is a brother I can never have. Okay, back to agenda. lol. We spent some quality time at the Arcade and at around 10 Nab, Ida and me went to check in for a night. We initally went to Rest House at the Bandar area? Anddd gosh, that place sucks and seriously...errr..scary. pretty much like a forbidden place? yeah, it is. We ended up staying at De Gallery hotel at Batu Satu. It is cheap and really nice. we are so going to check in there lagi nanti! hehe. Oh yeah, i forgot to mention, I went for shopping with my family before I got picked up at 130ish yesterday andddd I bought 5 clothes? Err I am not gonna buy any more clothes. I need to save up, It is raya and raya means extra spending? lol. Anyway, positive side, those clothes aren't so expensive. HEHE.

Today I went to Limbang with Ida, Nab and Syam. and I wasn't feeling so energetic honestly. Didn't really talk much. I even fell asleep during hair rebonding. pfft. Ngaleh jua sudah tu. lol. I didn't buy much at Limbang. I bought like Beras? lol. And some crackers for Raya. and still I got RM 40ish in my wallet. I'd just keep it for my next trip to Miri with Usu :) All of us were exhausted that we actually had a good nap in the boat on our way home. Nasib boat nya comfy wa. lol. My mum picked me up at Tambing and we went to Gadong for Sungkai :) We initially wanted to watch a movie. I actually bought the tickets already but then my sister got really sick so I got the ticket refund in the end. I don't really mind though. the movies aren't so good I think? yeah.

Umm,next sungkai would be with the girls. HEHE. on the 5th i'm sure. Bowling den sungkai. I'm in. Then then next sungkai part 2 at cappers restaurant with C3? wait, didn't i say during d first few days of Ramadhan dat I won't have buffet thingy? RIGHT. But then this is quite better than last year jua. Lol. Okay, I'm mumbling now ;)

Okay, next.... Ummmmmm, okay, at this very moment, I feel quite okay and I really want to keep this feeling or aura. I'm listening to MP3s and yeah, songs do somehow improve my mood :) there are times i feel so defeated. I know i keep on saying this repetitively. I think for now I am gonna give up telling myself things like 'I am strong', 'I can do this' and blabla. I'd just go with the flow. As I said, I am not giving up but I might as well am doing so bit by bit...I just don't know what to do. I'm not truly lost. Again, I really think 'defeated' is the best term to describe it

Alright, I think I have talked quite a lot. Goodnight. Salam and have a good weekend tomorrow everyone :)

Im sleepy. Dvd cancel? Toink.

Another Update

2010-08-24T06:38:00.000+01:00

Okay, it seems like I no longer belong to blogging world. I have been thinking to update my blog recently and only now I kind of push myself to do this? lol. Anyway, first of all, I know it is in the middle of Ramadhan already, but yeah, Selamat Menunaikan Ibadah Puasa to every Muslims in this entire world. Umm, what else... There are things I wanna express here but I am not quite sure how to begin it. Like blog is an alternative 'place' to spill things out right? Few days before Ramadhan I kinda put a set in mind to practice some sort of self meditation during the Ramadhan? I'm not doing that for fun and I know some people might think why would I have to make such a fuss on this meditation thingy. I mean, Ramadhan is the month where everyone generally be good and avoid making any sins? Physically and emotionally? A duration to cleanse the internal and external of our mind and soul? heart? Okay, I think I've mentioned enough. lol

Reasons behind the self meditation thingy? Umm, how do I say this. Okay, technically it just occurs to me that things don't always go or stay the way we want it or the way we imagine it to be? I have this assumption or shall I say belief, that when I have beautiful pictures of future of something, they are not going to take place eventually? Like I get excited and all giddy because of the things that I wish and think would happen but in the end I got myself down to the drain? Certain people say that I am being way too negative. I am a negative thinker. okay, i admit that. but seriously, I just so detest the feeling of taking certain things for granted and in the end they eat me, bit by bit. So, yeah, better be prepared. I'm not strong, not that strong. Though I know I've been through the worst but still, they do not make me that powerful or strong. They just after all, make me be careful? we learn from experience and learn not to do the same mistakes?

Okay, I feel like I pretty much mumble. sigghhh. Honestly, I am not quite sure what am I really feeling at the moment. I was not really okay weeks ago. I went through a phase where I ashamedly admit, being totally weak and helpless? powerless. and yeah, those moments were totally sucks. anyway, i needed to get up. so yeah. i'll do my best to be okay. insya Allah. no one is gonna truly help me if I don't sort myself out. im sure every cloud has its own silver lining and things just happened. I just need to go with the flow. things happen for reasons. im not giving up, not really i'd say but i just don't think i own the power to make things go the way i want. so, i'd expect less and less, get myself prepared for the worst and try to care less. i defeat.

So for now, Im gonna stick with this self meditation thingy till i am entirely okay. i should know by now not to take anyone or anything for granted. and never ever be sure that things gonna stay the same in the future. i should learn my lesson now.

I am not mad, i am not. I just feel seriously defeated and helpless. And i just want to be okay. And i think insya Allah I am getting better by day. Keeping everything to ourselves is proven not a good idea. i love my mom, my family and my dear fellows who give me reasons to laugh and be okay. :) It is just good to laugh merrily and sincerely. it is one of the right ways to take our mind off things.

Okay, enough spilling out. I am looking forward for this coming weekend. I really think I'd manage to take my mind off certain things better during this coming weekend. Frankly speaking, I pretty much appreciate company these days. I am craving for things to do and places to go. :) Cohort 3 family, I'd surely be bored during the semester break *sighh.

Just a piece of reminder to myself, do not think about those who can't be there for us, think about those other who love and appreciate us better :)

Salam, happy fasting, have a good Ramadhan :)

updatess.

2010-06-30T02:46:00.001+01:00

Whoa. When was the last time I updated my blog? A month-ish ago? Hehe. Anyway,salam reader:D

There are quite numbers of updates I'd like to post here but then I just don't as where or what I shall begin with. Alright, I will just start with my training thingy as a start ^^

It has been a month or so since I first came here. I unexpectedly started 'working' on the 29th May. I was the second one to come. Then came Nadzirah. And for a while they were only the three of us. Until another three, Farah,Cathrina and Ida joined us. And we get closer as days passed. Ka Nuran, Faizal and Nabillah joined us just before the introductory lecture started. Ka hjh huraini will join us somewhere new week, I guess. :)

Anyway, during the first few days I was...err kinda lost. I was like...'what the HELL did i get myself into?'. Haha. Okay, cut the 'hell' part. Things aren't so bad. Blood and injections still give me the creepy and nausea feelings but I do think I can get over them sooner or later. I can never avoid doing extraction and ID block injection during my training course. Alright Yuh, as a dental therapist and hygienist, u should not be bothered by blood thingy. Lol. We haven't really started our major course lecture but so far okay lah. I want to get my laptop soon? Hehe. And still thinking whether to use broadband or eSpeed services. Umm, ummm.

Alright, next. Umm, my family already moved out to Penanjong. Have I mentioned that? And today mum gonna give the key back to DO department. We are just left with the store thingy to deal with. Umm, I initially dislike my new home due to hyper number of lizards. But i guess I am getting used to them and their disgusting lil sh*t. :P

Umm, what else? Umm, oh yeah, I officially lost a friend recently, eh no, as a matter of fact, she lost me. Not saying I'm on the right side. But girl, we are no longer in our glorious form 4 or 5 anymore. And seriously, if you can't get rid of ur selfishness and ego, do at least try to 'reduce' and minimise them. The world does not evolve around you. It is okay for you to bluntly say 'i don't want to see your face for the time being'. And it is not when I said I agree with you. You suggested that. My words kill you? Hurt you a lot? Jadi nya kata kata mu tu manis and mesra la bagi ku? I just said very little and you reacted as if I cursed and shouted at you. Lol. Cali. One conclusion, you will never change. You have to ask yourselves why a person hardly stands you. That includes me, your most tolerant friend. I mean, used to be. Lol.

Alright, I think I'm done updating for now. I think I miss some updates. Might update them in coming posts? Hehe.

Good day people. :)

updatesss :D

2010-05-21T07:00:00.003+01:00

Salam~hi~when was the last time I updated my blog? few weeks ago? that feels so...umm..lama? Lol. hehe. anyway, i just finished my class and thought that I would stay for a while and update my blog :D

There were few few things that I feel like sharing here. but since i am kinda eager to go home due to starvation so i will just try to keep my post brief :p hehe.

I have done my maths P1 and P3 and English Lit P32. Maths P1 was quite easy, P4...ummm..macam apa~lol and lit...okay lah. err, well, not so okay thinking that I did not do any revision or put any effort on poetry. The prose section was okay, at least I do have some knowledge on one of the books, compared to last year I just blindly did the essay without reading the book itself. okay, enough complaining :))

Last Sunday we had Usu Bini's birthday party. it was nice and pretty much last minute. hehe. i guess last minute genes just generate through my family :p i'm talking bout my mum's side, of course. :) anyway, my boyfriend and I last minute looked for a gift and he bought Lancome Paris perfume for usu bini, my mum bought her a purse-last minute and my cousin bought her glucose detector device and Abg Anip bought a BBQ grilled set, lurus ka tu? hehe. Abg Anip's family, Angah's and mine of course were there during the function. it was a success. the food was nice, the gathering was nice. i'd say things just went smoothly. most importantly, usu bini was definitely happy :D

something which was not in the 'plan' took place on that night anyway. honestly speaking, initially, i felt totally betrayed and mad by that additional 'event' but later on i felt grateful. well, i am grateful. i am grateful though it is partly responsible for putting me in misery during the last few days.

oh yes, i have been feeling quite depressed back in the last few days. i feel as if my heart is swelling, that was what i pretty much had been feeling back in few days ago. but now, no thanks. i am very determined not to let things like that bring me down macam apa :) one upsetting thing should not have the power to deny me any other happiness and excitements. it is just plain not healthy. =)

alright, what else? oh yeah, just something to share. somewhere last week, a person, whom i thought would never ever wants to see my face ever again,just spent almost three hours talking with me. it was quite surprising yet it was just nice. i mean, not that i want anything from that person or something. it is just purely nice to know that we are cool. no resentment on my part and on ia punya side jua, seems to be ;). it is just nice to see that we can become friends again. i have known better that some things are just not meant to be no matter how hard you push it to work out :)

oh yeah, one more thing, the dentistry nursing tu? i was kinda worried that i might find difficulty to adapt the whole thing without people called 'friends' and now i am justtttt happpppyyyy, purely happy to know that Nazirah Sabeli, same intake with me during A level, got the same offer jua:D i won't be totally friendless then. hehe. she texted me last night and she said too that she is glad :D now, this piece of news is just another good thing that ease out my depressing mood :D anyway, i just need to go to Ong Sum Ping lagi. idk what am i supposed to do or get from there ;0 but yeah, i want to get started. well, a bit. hehe. part of me still wanna have more leisure time with Bolly, Salsa, movies and books :p

it is someone's birthday today. a person i no longer regard as a friend. for reasons i don't have to mention here. anyway, i greeted her. i have been thinking about this and yes i indeed texted her up and i said i forgive her and i ask her to forgive me for any wrongs i have done. i don't mean any harm on doing this. being on a good term with the person i mentioned above just makes me think of letting by gone be by gone. i am not seeking for friendship when i texted this once upon a time friend of mine. it just feels right. no harm done. she does not reply my text, that is totally fine thinking that i myself did not repond to her text last year. =)

okay, did i actually say i would keep this post short and brief? haha, i got carried away with talkativeness. hehe. anyway, i just wanna say, i feel better. better than yesterday. better than the last few days. i know i am quite...err..oversensitive with things at times? well, i am not proud to be cematu and i don't expect people to understand me when i behave childishly but yeah, that is just me and...and apanah? lol. i'm lost for words now :p

ertinya suruh beranti blogging and go home now. haha. goddd~ now i feel like the normal me. i feel quite bright. :p

when it seems to be worthless, it just does not seem right to me to just keep waiting, wishing or hoping that certain things or action will take place. so i just need to move on and live my life. life is quite short to be wasted on depression, sadness and frustration. :D i know i can be complicated and i am not proud of it but that should not put me on eternity misery. trouble is friend, trouble is a foe =)

Good day people! :D i wanna do serious revision on maths later. hehe. i hope :p. habis maths nyaman tah dikit rasaku nie :D

p/s: i love them, them i love. lol. =) and he's one of them =]

demotivated.

2010-05-06T07:58:00.000+01:00

Salam~ it's May already. My exam is next week, which is LESS than a week. Lol. And I should be worrying and giving my 100% commitment on it. And yet here I am, blogging while waiting the youtube finishes loading Barbie as the Island Princess. Oh yeah, exam tapi mampu lagi liat Barbie. LOL. alright, alright, I sound snappish. I better... stop blurting out like nobody's business. =)

*sigh. I just feel quite demotivated today. I am a bit blur, extra clumsy and is not so focus today. I know there are things that I ought to do at this very moment. But I just feel like 'can I skip you for today?'. Okay, I don't wanna complain. That won't help me at the moment. What I need is a dose of healthy motivation and determination. Later at night I am teaching. And I have to take over Eham's class since he has something going on :)

Okay, new new updates. The nursing under dentistry one? The one I kinda wanted all this time? Well, I got it. I received the letter on Monday, 3rd May. The letter does not include the details like where I am going to do the 3 years study-I am kinda sure it will be in Brunei anyway =) and when I am going the start doing the course. I am only told to do medical check and attached the medical test report with the offer letter within 28 days from the day the letter was sent. And I've done almost all the test, just left with the Mantoux test. =)

What else? Ahh, finally, we can move out already. But not too soon lah. We don't want to rush. We will move out our things slowly. By June, I hope we can get over the moving out business. =)

Umm, what else? I think I am quite done. Just wanna update my blog and try to get back some 'working' mood but seems to no avail. lol. I'm off watching Barbie now= )

Good day.

Friday's post

2010-04-23T07:16:00.000+01:00

Salam and good afternoon =) I have just finished arranging things and stuffs at Tuition school. Uncle Din is giving me the secretary post after all. He talked to me earlier and he asks me to do account report for both March and April. And I haven't started on it yet. I will get started either later or tomorrow morning. =)

I meant to blog about last week's date before this but I just hadn't got the time or mood to do so. I will just include it briefly.

I went out with him last week as usual. We were planning to watch When In Rome initially but we ended up having our 'date' at Salon. I had my hair cut and touched up last week. Thanks to him for the treats and also for staying with me through the whole process. That look of yours while I was having the touch up stuff, was really cute and funny ;p We watched When In Rome the next day instead, and I'd give 7/10 lah. Not bad and quite funny. I like the heroin. She is pretty and cute =) After movei, we went to Kiangeh Foodstall and yes I simply enjoy the view and scenery. =) Before going home, we went to JP and played the horse riding thingy-i don't know what it is called...Merry go something? :p and we did the boat cruising thingy =)I simply love spending time with him =)

Another thing, Uncle Roslan's wife got admitted to the ICU back in few days ago and she passed away this morning. Condolence to her family, especially Uncle Roslan. May her soul res in peace. It must be hard for Uncle Roslan thinking that it hasn't even been a year that they got married. Al- Fatihah for her...

Alright, I am a bit blur. I mean there are few things that I have been thinking about these few days. Random things and I could not really say them out precisely. So until I have figured out what are those things, I would just keep it to myself. =)

Sometimes, what we do, intentionally or unintentionally, is possible to make others wonder what is our real perspective. We can say this and that but somehow tiny tiny things that we do or say might make others question our honesty and sincerity.

Alright, I better be off soon. I am hungry and just had zero coke that Uncle Din bought for me only, despite my throat is not feeling well. No breakfast and obviously no lunch.

Good day people =)

Morninggg mumbling.

2010-04-17T01:47:00.001+01:00

Alright, I will do this briefly and get back to revisionnnn. I just feel like talking :P. Salam and morning btw :)

Later I'm going out with him. Gonna watch When In Rome, watched the trailer, seems to be funny oh. Hee. I was actually feeling 50-50 to go out with him today. I wanted to do revision. And was thinking to meet him up tomorrow instead. But nehh, on hearing his voice, I simply lost my stand and 'melt'. I'm going to do extra work and take extra time saja to make up with the revision stuffs ^,^ Self dicipline? Okay dokay? Lol.

What else? Ahh, I just feel like saying this loudly. I LOVE MY MOM. Haha. I know all people do too. She's not difficult.. And we should really know better not to unappreciate her. Err, what am I saying? Alright, I don't feel right to hide things from her. I know some of the stuffs that I consider as 'things' might be defined as benda benda remeh to some people. I do not dare to drive far without my mum knowing. What if I got ketulahan for going behind her back? Anyway, I hid something from her recently. And yeah, see, inda berkat betapuk dari indung. She found out and texted me. Well, good thing I was at my usu's house that time. I don't think I have the guts to admit it. It is easier for me to say I'm sorry thru texting. Yeah yeah, cowardice. :/

Anyway, she was mad and frustrated with me. But then she just didn't bother to show it or to scold me. Which is worst. I rather her say something.. Err wait, do I really prefer that? Lol. But either way, I feel like I have betrayed her trust. I know I sound exaggerating but that is a piece of fact. My mum is cool, so I am supposed to take advantage of it? We never really talked bout that something before. Just asking me briefly bout it. And yesterday, I was the one who mentioned it and she didn't get...err..tense? She just said 'Lain kali pikir dulu, tanya okay kah inda'. So,conclusion, Mum knows what's best. Hehe. Most of the time. :p

What else? I think I better stop. Good day people =)

Late Night Blogging

2010-04-14T19:45:00.000+01:00

Salam, its err... okay what time is it now? haha. It's 2.04 am and I was quite sleepy an hour or so ago. Indirect thanks to my cousin for making me staying up so lateee~:p I'm sleeping over at Usu's cribs, unplannedly. I desperately wanted to see my cousin ealier -3 days not seeing her, and yes I missed her a lot. Not used to not seeing her for so long lol. Anyway, I last minute decided to go to her house after Bolly and Usu insisted me and my sister o sleepover here tonight. Since I am not going to the Library early in the mornin after all, so okay lo~

Alright, I don't want to talk so much tonight. Just few few things, I had another written test at SPA this afternoon and I did not make any preparation. I technically hardly remember me applying for the post :) Anyway, the test was...err totally 'alien' to me. The questions would have been at least a bit easy if I happened to pay the slightest attention on Flight stuffs. Lol. Anyway, I don't mind. It isn't something I would like to have. =)

Bolly was quite okay. I felt good. Felt kinda fresh after Bolly though we didn't do Sonia tadi. On this coming Friday, Salsa nada. and seriously, I want Salsaaaaa. I miss doin Salsa ramai2. I remember Tick Tock and Insomnia steps by heart already but it is not quite fun ler to do it sorang2. I could not truly feel the excitement and energy doing it on my own.

Enough complaints now. Just another few few things, it's less than a month to go to Exam so I seriously better put my uttermost focus and concentration on my papers. "Time management" =)

Okay dokay, I think I've talked enough fo now. I can feel myself mumbling already. Heh. Just gonna leave you guys with a song lyrics.

L is for the way you look at me

O is for the only one I see

V is very, very extraordinary

E is even more than anyone that you adore and

Love is all that I can give to you

Love is more than just a game for two

Two in love can make it

Take my heart and please don't break it

Love was made for me and you

(trumpet instrumental)

L is for the way you look at me

O is for the only one I see

V is very, very extraordinary

E is even more than anyone that you adore

Love is all that I can give to you

Love is more than just a game for two

Two in love can make it

Take my heart and please don't break it

Love was made for me and you

Love was made for me and you

Love was made for me and you

^^

Goodnight~err morning I mean =p

Laughters.

2010-04-10T20:04:00.001+01:00

It's 2.00 am sharp. I had my quick shower,done laundry and et cetera. Hehe. I just feel like blogging. It was rather a tiring day but one of those days that I kinda...cheerish ;) Since it is quite late, I'm just gonna 'summarise' bout today. Lol

Date:
I had a date with dearest one this afternoon. Wanted to watch Night Date but the earliest show we could have got was at 4.25pm, which was quite inconvenient since I had to teach at 7. So we just went to few shops before getting ourselves few cakes at Mum's bakery and went to Muara's beach. :) I love it there. Nice place indeed :)

Class:
I seriously never fail to feel 'happy' having my Sat's class. My students are hyper. Seriously :p I got four new students and I am truly glad that they did not seem to be so shy or difficult to approach. They simply fit in wonderfully :D Oh yeah, my student gave me chocolate again and it is dark one and yes I simply love it :D I haven't eaten it. Let just save it for tommorow. I've had enough chocs and cakes thingy for today :p

Gathering:
I received a last minute text from my cousin saying that they would pick me up after teaching so I could join them going to Lambak. Abg Anip's family was having a family BBQ and invited us to come. So after teaching we went there and I had more and more food lagi :p they had some karaoke-ing going on but we were more comfortable to stay indoor. So we just sat,talked,had cups of tea. And yes I rather enjoyed this too. Abg anip's family feels like part of our family already. Especially Abg Anip and his mom. And his aunty. They are friendly and I don't know, I just like them :)

Birthday:
It's 11th of April. It's someone's birthday;) Happy 20th birthday to Qens. May Allah always bless thee with happiness, success and guidance. :)

Alright. I'm sleepy already and yes I am going to bed after this. Goodnight~

Hot weather.

2010-04-05T11:54:00.001+01:00

Alright. I wanted to have my shower twenty minutes ago and yet here I am. I was thinking to go somewhere and blog via pc but no, I don't want to go out tonight. I want to buy few things but I kinda have enough of driving today. O.o I feel like going back and forth. And I do think the weather was hot that it made me feeeelll tired of driving and walking earlier today. *sigh.

Alright. Enough complaining. Let me talk about few few good things that might improve my quite sulky mood. I hope so =)

Last Friday, I finally got my heels after going to few stores. And yes I like,eh no,I love it :) Thanks to whom it may concern for the willingness, sincerity and patience for accompanying me. ;) Later in the afternoon I had salsa with my cuzzie. And we did simple salsa. Soft salsa and I wanted something energetic that day. But yeah, before the session ended, we did Insomnia, Tick Tock and Perhaps songs. So,good enough =)

Saturday.. I went out with him. And we watched The Clash of Titans on that day instead of yesterday. Okay lah. Not bad. I'd give umm 7 out of 10? Yeah. I think so. The movie has few few similar characters in Percy Jackson. Only,the characters in Percy Jackson are cuter,prettier and funnier. Heh. Not really scary looking ;)

At night I had my class. It was Mijan's and Adi's last class. I bought them chocolate on that night. And Mijan called me 'kaka' masa tu. He was teasing initially but somehow he meant it. And that just kinda make me realized that I somehow view or treat most of my students more like lil siblings. Lol.

What else.. Sunday my family, usu's and angah's went to Abg Anip's bro's wedding ceremony at Lambak. Did I mention in the previous post that my cuzie and I bought three kain for this one particular function? Haha. We were indeed crazy. We wanted to wear the same kain and we bought gray initially. Then we changed to Pink and while getting my pink kain, we saw kain yg extra lawa. And we went dup dap? Haha. The next day we bought it. And this 'special' kain is glittery anddd we ended up being 'glittery-ish' yesterday. We left traces of glitter here and there. Heh. Anyway, we joined Abg Anip's family going to Kg Ayer to send Pengantin Lelaki. Hee. I got kinda thrilled naik boat =p

We went back on 'darat' at 3ish. My mum dropped at Pertama Lambak since I was going out with him again. We watched How To Train Your Dragon and yes I so agree that it is awesome indeed. ;) Toothless is cute indeed. Mcm kucing hitam. Hehe.

What else ah? Oh yeah, I bumped into Zaim Ali last night. And this morning while going out with my mum, we bumped into Ilham. And idk. Tadi he wasn't so..chaotic.. Lol. I mean usually these days I always see him..a bit chaotic. Lol. He was with nini nya. And his nini is just as friendly as his mum. Just a lil cooler. Haha. I'm just not used to seeing a granny chilling arah easyway. :p Eham's lil czn,Aaron, yg eham ggtan pun ada. I agree with Eham,belabih! =p my mum said so too. X)

Alright. It's almost 7. I wanna take shower now. Take care people =]

It is beyond control and may seem not logic. No perfect explanation or theory. I just do. Simply do. <3

Update.

2010-03-30T04:06:00.001+01:00

Hey Salam and morningg peepps~ again, I just feel that I am obliged to update my blog. Haha. Lol. Before I got lazy and lazy to do this so yeah, to avoid is better than to cure. Lol. *here comes the extremeness.

Just few updates.. Usu Bini got admitted to the Hospital, initially due to asthma and later they figured out that she has a diabetes. Huhu. And yeah, the whole thing kinda makes me think that I should really learn to eat vegetables now. Anddd as predicted, I haven't done so. Not yet. Anyway we hope Usu bini will be fine :)

What else ah? Talking about hospital, I haven't met the doctor for period problem thingy. I procrastinated this since...like months ago? Silly me. I will definitely do this when I feel like doing so. Lol.

Next.. Umm, umm, oh yeah.. I have finished watching You're Beautiful. Hehe. My cousin bought the dvd so I would sleepover at her place masa tu. I slept at 630ish am for the sake of watching it. Haha. Anyway, the ending isn't bad. Or maybe I kinda knew how it ends so I didn't really feel disappointed. ;) My cousin bought another Korean Drama anddd yes I am so going to borrow it after exam. Perfect Match or Bad Couple-another nice one. I just watched a bit of it. I think the last few episodes kali anddd I technically got 'attracted' to watch it. Well, mostly due to the actors,obviously:p One of the actors is typically a 'too good to be true' guy with 'too good to be true' manners. With that baby face, I just inevitably get a 'crush' on him. :P Not too much though. My cousin got him first.HAHA. Godd. Another actor, I like seeing his face though he's quite old sudah. Cute and idiotic look. ;)

Alright, enough korean drama crap-ping. Lol. What else ah..? Okay. Just feel like saying few lines of mine :)

Since when dreams are logic and make sense?

Before I got mad at others, I should think first-have I never done the same thing?

A test or karma?

Take no one for granted so when people let you down, you won't feel so downn to the drain :)

worry less.

These are few things on how my life is based on. I worry a lot and at times let hormones overrule rationality. Hence before reacting, I apply these 'rules' first. Few times I simply failed though.

Alright. Enough mumbling. Gond day people :)

Another Family Outing ♥

2010-03-24T16:55:00.000Z

Salam~ I am blogging again. Hehe. I just had a superb dinner with Usu's family. Usu Laki's cooking just never failed to make me eat a lot and a lot. He cooked one of my favourite dishes, Ikan masak Sambal Pedas if I am not mistaken =) Delicious food indeed. *okay! stop talking about food, alrightttt? lol.

Anyway, we had another family outing yesterday. The plan was actually not confirmed initially since Mom was kinda sick during the day time. But yeah at the eleventh hour we did go after all. Our cousin from Bandar joined us too and it was really nice to have her around too. Kaka Nurul treated us the tickets, the ticket is quite cheap. I think it costs a person around $1.25. I think so. Anyway, the circus show was not that long. It only took like 30 minutes kali saja but yeah t was fun and funny. I laughed during the two brothers' performance :D

Haha okay I delayed my blogging tadi due to msn :p Anyway let me finished talking about what we did yesterday. hehe. After the circus performance we went to main the boat thingy, I seriously do not know what does that thing or game called as. I'm pretty much sure you guys know what I am talking about thought hehe. It was kinda fun. My partner was my own lil monster sister, Nurmaisurah. haha. She was being funny and we were being quite ironic. Why? Well, I was not so good on 'kemudi-ing' the boat and she got like....annoyed? Haha I just could not find the right way of writing to share with you what really happened during the so-called cruise. After that we, as in my sister, Nurul Damit and me myself accompanied the kiddos played at the Playground and when it started to rain we decided to go home. Well, we had late dinner before going home, Abg Anip's treat. Thanks again Abg Anip :D

What else... Umm today.. Well, just few few things. I am more than half done with The Host and yes cerita nya siuk. I love it and I am going to continue reading it after this. Anyway, in the afternoon me and Sis Nurul brought Nurul Damit to the library, meant to find some useful books there but to no avail. The wireless is not fixed, yet. lol. Then we went to a restaurant since I hadn't had my lunch. Before that we looked for a sport shoes for Nurul Damit since we were bringing her to Bolly class. hehe. Bolly was quite fun and not so brutal today. We enjoyed ourselves and oh yeah Sis Wes joined us, finally. hehe. She is getting engaged on the 11th April-on Qen's birthday and I am going to attend the function with Sis Nurul. Insya Allah.

Elza asked for my lil help on msn later and I so agree with her that the questionnaire is really really tough. haha. mcm specific :p I only helped her with two questionnaires. Hehe. Then what else? Ahh, a dear friend of mine texted me on msn. It has been a while we didn't talk to each other. I was a bit surprised actually. :) Yuyu- when was the last time I was being called with this name? lol

Next...umm, I'm pretty much done talking. I think so. Hee.

So goodnight and sleep well :)

I'm careless, which can be funny yet annoying. lol

Updating.

2010-03-23T01:51:00.000Z

For the sake of updating. Yeah that is pretty much why I decided to do this :p Anyway, hi and salam peeps. =)
I am at my usu's house, another sleepover. This time my cousin, Nurul Damit, from Bandar joined us. I hadn't really 'communicate'-not that we are NOT talking at all, lol- with her since last night,mostly due to my sister and I arrived kinda quite late semalam. Could on;y be here after I finished my class.Alright, just gonna give straight away updates. =)

DLS Bowling Outings
We had it finally on last Saturday. Zaim, Sheikh, Bella, Shahrul-was kinda excited on seeing him :p- were there. Yazid was ill to join us, never mind, we will see him next time =) Last time I saw him was during last year's Sungkai with DLS.Oh wait, I'm confused. Masa Final Destination or Shahrul's birthday? Lol, anyway, importantly it has been a while :p My boyfriend and Qens joined us too. The three of us had our lunch first before joining the others. And technically, I did not try playing bowling. But still I love to see the others having their good laugh while playing it. Elza had so much fun =D

After bowling we went to Mall, Zaim, Bella and Shahrul did not join us. Too bad Zaim was not coming. I wanted to treat him. I promised him that I'd treat him once he got his 6 pacs. Haha. Anyway, we watched Solomon Kane. Initially I kinda wanted to watch Remember Me but both my Boyfriend and Qens said the story is kinda boring. Qens had watched it. So yeah, that kinda made me did not want to watch it. lol. Talking about Qen, I am glad that she did seem to enjoy herself too on that day =)

Alright, what else... Umm, I already got my timetable. And my first paper would be on 17th May-if I am not mistaken. English Literature paper 3. Poetr lagi tu. Bla Bla Vidaaaa~ So Yuh, get your head into Poetry now. Read, analyse and understand the poems. I guess. Lol. Try to speak like a poet and think like Shakespeare. HAHA now that is a bit extreme. I don't know him in person so....whatever. lol

Later I am going to the library though I am not sure at what time but yeah it is a must. An aunt that I know needs help in doing her essay. Something about leadership. I didn't manage to help her yesterday. Just a little since I was in a rush and got some other few things to do =)

Aero class was kinda brutal yesterday. Especially the last part where we did aerobic on the floor. It wasssss tiringggggg. Our muscles hurt. Lol. Now I'm whining. Later we are not going for Aero. We are going to JP later. hehe. To watch the Circus Perfomance from Aussie. and by chance I hope to play some of the games. =DD It feels like forever I haven't been there.

What elsee? I think I'd just stop. Caio.

Agai migis magai bogoipregen. =)

Positiveee.

2010-03-18T04:52:00.002Z

Salam and hi~ I feel kinda GOOD. Haha. Not hyper, just gracefully good. And indeed I thank my boyfriend for this. I'm not exaggerating. He's kinda an antidote for me now? Lol.

For the last few days I have been feeling kinda tense. Few things bother me. Part of me told me not to worry too much and just to ignore all those stuffs. Unfortunately, just to ignore those things, that is something Yuhana hardly can do. See, I was torn into two. :) To say that I wasn't affected by those things, that is a lie and it made me feel like crap to put on an act and etc. Hence came the irritation and not so good aura. Lol. Hehe.

Anyway, now? I am willing to compromise and 'keep the cool'. I sincerely mean this. :) People make mistakes and are unreasonable at times. That includes me. So yeah. I am letting go all the weird feelings I was keeping recently. I won't take granted that they won't come back later. For now, let just say farewell, please? Okay, I'm talking in a crappy way now :p

'Don't say I will TRY my best, say I will DO my best'. To try means you won't really do your best. To do means you'd try and put your 100% effort on it. I have to agree with him :)

Alright, I wanna get back to chores. So, caio. Have a good day people :)

Though I don't know where did I do wrong, still forgive me for whatever wrongdoings I have commited without intention. I am sure you have your own reasons for doing those certain things. :)

Birthdays.

2010-03-11T05:22:00.001Z

Happy Belated birthday to my dearest cousin, Siti Nuurul Himah Zali and Happy birthday to her boyfriend, Hanifah Puasa. :D. May Allah bless the two of them with success, prosperity, longevity and happiness. :D

We had a gathering for their birthdays last night at Usu's cribs. Angah with the family,my family,my boyfriend, Abg Anip and his brother,Irfan. as the guests. Usu didn't cook anything last night, they just used catering's services. The food was okay and we had Chocolate ice cream cake. Andddd most of us were full already when we had the cake :P

Again, I love family gathering. It was funny when both Kaka Nurul n Abg Anip refused to blow out the candles. They said 'mcm kanak2'. :P And and I'm happy that they both like the gifts that we gave to them x)

Next birthday....umm, I think it'll be in May. On the 16th-birthday usu bini, four days after Elza's birthday! :D.

What else? Ahh, I got another written test on the 14th. ;) Something to do with Assistant Perubatan? Heh. Forgot already x) In the afternoon, I'll watch Alice in Wonderland. Kinda looking forward to it. My cousin pun. She already booked their tickets. :p

What else? Hmm, nada x. Lol. I feel like a bit 'lame'. Just a piece of food for thought, to look at our own mistakes and flaws seems to be a lot difficult than to point fingers at others. When we made mistake and we don't want to admit it,then don't... If we are too ego to admit it, fine, keep it to ourselves and try not to do the same thing again. I'm not a saint, I'm not the world's most prudent person. I make mistakes, I did some people wrongly and I'm trying to be a better person and I'd appreciate it if people don't make it hard for me to do so. I don't want to get mad, to get annoyed, to be proud of myself or my life. I'd be a jerk when I'm mad. Things would alter if I start saying something. All the good things I have would be taken back if I'm too 'proud'.

Alright. I'm sorry to bore you with my talks :)

Love Me.

2010-03-08T11:27:00.001Z

Alright. I'm kinda tired. No, I mean my feet are tired. Been looking for few things for an upcoming event. Hehe. Again, a last minute one. I at least have to do the booking stuffs by today. Yeah. I must :)

I had my class earlier this afternoon and I found out my new students, they are siblings and they are elder than me. They look young, really no kidding. The eldest one ada anak sudah. Anyway, acknowledging this piece of truth, I asked them not to call me teacher anymore. I don't feel quite comfortable. Plus they are nice ladies. They called me Hana. Good thing I'm used to 'Hana' already. :D

Then what else...? Ahh, I wanna find out how to make pancakes. Hehe. Been craving for it since yesterday? No,actually when my boyfriend told me that he knows how to make pancake. Anyway, I haven't had any pancake. My mum wanted to eat cucur tadi so yeah next time. :) If I'm rajin I'd google the recipe. It should be easy. I want to make it soon and I kinda want him to be the first to try it, aside than my family of course ;)

It's 7.20ish already. Think I can do all the things I need to do by today? O.o

What else ah? Umm, umm. I already bought my Hamlet copy last Thursday with him. I'm kinda eager to get started on it but seriously I need to get done with Jane Eyre first. So Hamlet, wait for me dear. ;P Talking bout book, I have finished reading Twenties Girl. It is a very nice story. I love the storyline and the ending is satisfying enough :)

Alright. I need to go. Mum is here already. Gonna send her home and I'm off again buying some things with my sister. The kiddos got exam tomorrow.

I love what I'm doing, I love what I have. I love the people I have around me. To know that those things are worth to be loved of, those people love me back, how can I ever ask for more?:)

A week. Still his :)

2010-03-05T16:07:00.001Z

It's late. I'm tired and I should be sleeping at the moment but I just want to blog briefly-despite I am to wake up early tomorrow;)

Alright, I got another SPA interview and the post isn't something that I wanttt. I forgot to flunk in it during the test. Lol. Anyway, I'll try to be 'lame' tomorrow. LOL.

What else ah? Oh yeah, I wanna blog bout me being punk'd last night. By siapa nah, Zaim Ali. Basically I was gullible to seriously believe that he was 'jauh hati' with me. HAHA. I felt guilty, no kidding. I'm quite sensitive with things like this. You know, the feeling you got when someone asks a favor or something from you and you just can't give or do it for them. And that person got marah pasal you can't give it or do it for them. You ended up feeling guilty and torn between guilt and irritation? Like you feel powerless and feel quite annoyed at the same time that the other party doesn't seem to understand you and your situation? Wait, did I say something yang berbelit? Huhu. Okay, I'm mumbling. And attention, I am NOT referring my mumbling to Zaim Ali, okayy? Haha. Lol. I kinda over reacted last night due to something else. :) anyway, still I'm gonna knock Zaim's bold head when I see him next time. Maybe.

Next, ahh, I went shopping with my cousin,usu bini and my sister earlier this afternoon. We went to the Vogue Sale first. Then we went to Sunil and I bought a blouse. My cousin and usu pick it for me:) and yeah I like it, a lot. Then we went upstairs to see some heels. Lawa. Authentic Italian shoes. I got my eyes on few pairs but I didn't buy any. Hehe. I won't spend $300+ on heels,seriously. Though lawa. :p Then we went to Petani Mall and still,no heels caught my attention. Ada,but I don't like the colour. :/

What else ah.. Ahh yeah, my cousin and I went to Aero tadi. We were supposed to have Salsa class but Auntie Dayang got function. We ended with bollywood instead. Hehe. It was fun. Really. We always enjoy doing bolly and Salsa. :D. One phrase, tiring yet fun! :D

Okay, I'm sleepy. I better get some sleep.

Tomorrow I'm meeting him and I'm lookingggg forward to that. ^,^

Grateful. :)

Goodnight.

46th.

2010-02-28T15:41:00.001Z

I just got home from Bukit Beruang. I haven't taken my shower,done prayers and the laundry. But still I want to blog first before this 'graceful' feelings wearing off. :P

We had a surprise 'gathering' at Usu's cribs. Usu turns into 46 today. Well, his actual birth date is on 29th. But then 29th only comes once in every 4 years. Anyway, we still had the celebration. Organisers, me and my cousin. And seriously we are last minute type organisers. Haha. We grow up with that habit. :p

Idk but I find it funny when we plan something like this and then we forget little lil things and make clumsy clumsy errors. For example, I was almost sampai tadi and only at that time it occured to me, 'wouldn't he be even suspicious to see us?' . Toink. Then while waiting for Ngangah he asked me why would I want to drive when we all can just use one car with my mom. I almost said 'pasal inda muat, hadiah and kek apa'. Luckily usu bini quickly said that I was eager to drive. Lol.

Anyway, all in all, it was quite a success. Haha. I mean minus some lousy and clumsy parts. What important was to get Usu to be happy on getting such surprises. It was truly nice to see him liking the things that we gave him. For food, we had a slight difficulty on that since Usu Laki has always been the one who cooks in most gathering. Hence we decided just to tapau chicken rice:P

I'm feeling quite blissful. I love having gathering with my family. Family as in, Usu, Ngangah and us. And I'm feeling quite sentimental too. Not in a sad or bad way. How do I say this? Okay, I love my cousin. :) We have some similar habits and I find it quite amusing. She knows me quite well and it makes me feel a bit bad when I could not guess what she's thinking. We always talk 'gaga' language when we want to talk bout secrets or sensitive issues. Mostly things that we do not want the elders to hear or know. :p

"kagak, agakugu pagatugut bagagigitagaugu magamaga pagasagal zugudigi kagah?"

haha. Its not a new lang. But still,they don't know what we are talking about:p

Then,what else? Ahh, went to John's openhouse yesterday. Was nice to see him. We'll go for bowling nanti2. I hope so:) Zaim n Sheikh came earlier,so me and Elza didn't meet them. ;) After that, Elza and me went to some places. I was looking for my literature books and I found none. :[

Then we went to Huaho Bunut. My head was kinda aching-due to lack of sleep I bet- and I felt tremendously better after he came to see me and sent me home instead. ;)

alright,enough talking. I'm off. :)

Last but not least, happy 46th birthday Usu Laki. We love you:)

Zudi's ;)

2010-02-26T19:58:00.001Z

Insomnia. That is what it feels like. Haha. Nauzubillah. I only slept for an hour plus x sja? Slept at 1 n got waken up at 2ish. And I just couldn't get back to sleep. Ishh, inda bagus eh ;)

But then I'm not so irritated at the moment. In fact I am happy and feeling quite 'graceful'. :p

umm, okay, suddenly I'm lost for words.

Alright, I'd just do this briefly.

I am officially his. I am definitely in love with a guy who has been affecting my sleeps, speeding up my heart beats and giving me the spinning-out emotions :D. With Twenties Girl book as a witness, I'm yours and you are mine :)

It is almost four udahhh. Gahh. Later I'm going to John's house with Elza. Erk. I need my beauty sleep. Haha.

Alright,I'm off. Will try to get as much as sleep I can. Ishh. Inda bagus eh.

p/s: i miss him. :)

Accidentally in Love.

2010-02-25T15:42:00.001Z

Alright, I went through few 'waves of emotions' today. Since I don't know how or where should I start so I'm just gonna do it this way.

Interview:
My day pretty much began with apprehension and tiredness. I wasn't feeling well and didn't really think I had a sound sleep :) I wanted to stay in bed saja rasa nya BUT I had an interview to do. My first time interview at SPA. The post I applied for is Jurulatih Perawat Pergigian. There were two MOH officers and a guy taking notes down during the interview. It was okay. But then the man said that what I have in hands (as in my result) could take me further lagi. They said Dental Officer seems to be more suitable for me. They asked me whether I am married or not and later on asked me whether I am planning to start a family in 3 years time. I said 'no' and the man asked 'your fiancee? Boyfriend?'. I simply said, 'no fiancee,no boyfriend, no other commitment except for my family'. Lol. Anyway, all in all I don't know for sure dapat kah inda :)

AOB:
I'm going out again tomorrow with wani,her bf and their friends. Just convenient enough, I have no class tomorrow. We'll be watching movie. I'm not sure what movie though. Last time we watched Percy Jackson. It was nice. Simple storyline but truly not bad. And the guy is hot. Hotter than Zac Efron :p

AIL:
I know these few days I have been behaving way weird and 'crazy'. And I think the craziness will come to an end soon. Few things just got me thinking and make me determined to get my feet back on the ground. A girl I know got rejected by a guy she has only known not for too long. I know the guy too btw. They both got attracted with one another but the girl suddenly is taking things way too soon. And the guy changes his perspective on the whole thing. The girl ended up heart broken. That is the scenario basically. Why does this thing get me thinking? Well, I don't want to end up that way. I think I'm getting back my sensible sense. I want to stop feeling foolish. :)

AOB 2:
I cut my front hair btw. Yesterday. Well, I don't think it looks good. Eham said why do I want to cut my hair and be a clown? Ha-ha. Fun-ny. He didn't even see it.

Next, umm, I heard a different version of one's story. And idk. I don't want to judge and to sit on the fence is the only wise feedback I can truly give :)

Alright, I'm sleepy. Goodnight :)

Him.

2010-02-24T00:40:00.001Z

I'm feeling better. Or I thought I am. Lol. Went beaching with beloved friends yesterday. A last minute one. Hehe. And it was fun and a good distraction. Just the type of remedy I needed for my out of blue crazziness. There were me,Elza,Qens, Advv,Sheikh,Amir, Eham and his gang-inda tinggal ne adik adik nya ahh. Heh.

Qen and me had sand fight yesterday. It was fun and something that we do not usually do. And it felt goodddd. So darn good. And satisfying. It is just good to do something crazy when you're feeling crazy. Haha. Apa kan? What am I saying? Lol.

Okay,the truth is, I am not over the guy yet. My heart is still racing and I desperately want my heart to beat normally. Really. Lol. And I am so not looking forward to the date with M. I know serves me right for saying Yes. Gahh. Dude,it is not you who I want to have a date with. *sigh. Anyway, promise is promise. I should keep it. At least I have reminded him that it would be a day date only.

Alright, I want distract myself and get sensible. By today, this emotions-keep-on-spinning-out things must come to end. I hope. O.o

Dammit.

2010-02-22T00:57:00.001Z

I just woke up and I DID NOT have a sound sleep after all. And it irritates me like hell. Guess I'd take shower soon after this.

Okay what with this silly dup dap heart? Pounding heart? It was exciting at first but now I find it annoying. Kan menangis pun ada ku. I am definitely being silly here and I do not know why am I specifically feeling this way. I could not truly recall when was the last time I felt this way. Who was the last person who made me feel this way. Whenever it was,whoever it was,this feeling isn't new. Isn't new but still doesn't make sense to me. It is way and way ridiculous. It is scary. Terrifying. Yet it won't go away. I could truly identify who was the last one to make me feel this nonsense because I don't know what this feeling is.

I need to think straight. Think straight. Be sensible. I am sure I can do it later. Be rational.

Damn it. I hate you. No no, I don't. You are not a bad person and you are truly innocent. I hate myself. Yeah. That might be right. I should've controlled my mind,my emotions and be more resistant.

I'm trapped.

Okay,enough exaggerating. Time to be rational and wise. Yes, this should be easy :)

crazziness.

Update

2010-02-19T02:04:00.001Z

I'm sleepy. I keep on yawning and I just could not get back to sleep. Lol. I can close my eyes but my mind is fully awake and alert. Blavida~ And plus Vivi is still sleeping. Hehe. It is usually her getting up early. Kengalihan x ya. ;)

Anyway, I just wanna blog bout few things :) First of all, I said yes to the very same guy I mentioned few weeks ago. Yeah. I'm having a date with him after all. I haven't set the date but it is definitely a yes. Just a casual date,shouldn't be any harm ;) I said yes to him pasal...well,there is this another guy, I never meet him, just chat with him, he asks me out too and he is seriously annoying. Damn irritating. I always ignore him and only be good to him after he complained that I rarely reply his text on msn. Then he started calling me 'baby, sweety'. Hoho. Weird. I am no one's BABY okayy, moron. Haha. Mental. But yeah, aku inda suka. :[ anyway, pasal ia I kept on telling myself that I'd rather go out with M than ia. At least I know him and he is not that annoying. Lol. And ngam tah jua M asked me again last night, so I said yes tah saja.

Next, okay I got 3 A levels currently. 14
points. Itb for sure dapat, I think. But UBD, no. And I'm taking exam lagi to get into UBD. English Literature and Maths. Well, my mind set.. I told myself I really HAVE to do well in this coming June so I can do english literature. I was determined. Really,no kidding. Andddd then now I'm kinda...err lost? No, not that lost. Just unsure. I got an interview next week for the dentistry assistant post. I don't know yet. I just...don't know what to think. Like... Okay,I'm not taking for granted that I'd get the post. No, I can't be sure bout it. But still... Okay, I just need to be sure then I'd think further okay? So now, I'd just get my butt back to Jane Eyre, Top Girls and etc etc. Okay, cool? Lol.

I'm hungry. Heh. Orite, I'm off. Vivi is up already x)

Resign? Fired?

2010-02-10T00:49:00.002Z

I resigned and get fired at the same time? Was that possible? Well, I just did. Unexpected.

See, I was planning to resign by the end of this month. I want to put more focus on something else. And I planned to give a week or two notice to quit. But since the manager, Madam Cynthia is going to be on leave for two weeks plus, I had to tell her earlier. Alright, cut out the small small details, she got angry. Like real mad.

'So when are you going to resign?'

'I was thinking to stay till the end of-'

'No, today will be your last day. (to betty) Terminate everything. She could not touch the system, EXCO report. I don't want to pay you and you don't have to pay me'

I was dumbstruck on getting such cold hearted treatment. I was almost in tears. Oh I did cry,only after going out of the office ;'(I felt like throwing something at her. She didn't even have a diplomacy while talking to me. So I didn't give her that. Why should I bother giving her a polite tone as a return? Old bat. Superior cow.

Oh yes, I'm mad. I mean I was mad. At the moment I'm not really mad. I don't care. I just miss..miss them. And weird enough, I kinda miss going to the office the moment I walked out of it. I felt sad. I miss doing EXCO, Fol and going to the strong room. I even miss going to the ladies room. Haha. Really, it was one of my escape resorts. Lol. It is really clean and has good smell. I miss Irene, Wani, Richard, Joan,Ricky and Cally. And I am glad that they purely feel that farewell is suck. Irene, she supports me. If not because of her especially, I might feel tremendously sucks.

Anyway, I did 'earn' some sarcasms and talks too. And thank God I can be ridiculously ignorant. Haha. Basar dah tu suara durang becakap pun aku inda dgr. Haha. Anyway, as Irene said why should I care? True. Just value those opinions who do u more good than bad.

Anyway, I thank Wani and the boyfriend for bringing me jalan2 without me asking for it. Really, they are just friendly. One thing saja, they both love to eat and they pajal me to makan byk2. Haha.

Later I'm going to the beach with Vivi and Elza jua kali. Hehe. I wanna take a day or two days off before getting started with my mission. Lol.

Honestly, this is just too sudden.

Alright,I'm done talking:)

Sleepy.

2010-02-04T02:19:00.001Z

I'm here again. I'm sleepy. Gahh. I'd be glad to take a nap but I could not, I think. I got class krg mlm. It's so last minute yo~ and I haven't done my revision on the documentations & securities stuffs. Pfff.

I'm sleepy and hungry. Lol. What else? Ahh, I wonder why I could not log in my fb a/c. Talol.

I think I'm taking a nap after all.

Done complaining. I'm off. :) *wave

Sick.

2010-02-04T00:47:00.000Z

Hey, salam peeps. It's 4th of Feb and I'm not going to work today. Yesterday jua. I'm given two days of mc. And yes I'm treasuring my days off very very much. Lol. Despite the fact being absence for two days means I'm wasting away $60 of salary. I just do not really care:)

I wanted to update my blog last Saturday or Sunday but due to something, I totally didn't have the mood to blog and etc etc. Huhu. I even had to make myself update my fb status. Lol. It's just the sort of feeling when you feel too 'lazy' to do and deal with things. You even could not find the right words to say and feel like quitting from everything. Lol. And you even think to deny yourself any joy. Lol. That was what I have been feeling for the last few days. Perhaps this fever has something with it too. I just don't feel like going out ever again. Now that is exaggerating but it's true. Lol.

Alright, next.. Umm, there is this guy who added me on fb. He's a carcatunist-did I spell it right? Lol. Anyway, he draws cartoon,obviously. And I looked through his blog and I indeed find his drawings aren't so bad. Perhaps someday I'd ask him to make a drawing for me. It won't be free anyway. I found out from his blog he charges his drawing like $10 cematu. :)

alright, I wanna get up and take my medicine to ease away this headaches n muscle-aches. Lol. Till next post then. :)

p/s: I'd expose this blog again soon, I guess.

January ends.

2010-01-28T14:25:00.001Z

Two more days before January ends. Ehh wait, is it 3? HAHA! Anyway, salam and hello my fellow readers. I'm sleepy but I still want to do this. Lol. *yawning

Anyway, I had another SPA written test today. And yes I do hope I'd get this post. I'm not desperate. Well, I AM desperate to get a reason to get out of BBB. Haha. Lol. Not really lah. I think I can put up masih. I think.

Anyway,the test? Well, it was kinda okay. Twenty MCQs with 2 marks each, 3 confusing maths quests-6 marks each, drawing and labelling. Overall I think it was quite okay. I don't wanna be sure of it. :)

Maths questions nya.. It asked me 10 ml of analgesic is equivalent to how many tablespoon. I answered 2. The next two took me a while to work them out and be confident of the answers. Lol. Anyway, I did put effort and get it or not,tawakal saja. :)

What else? Ahh. Let's talk bout BBB. See, I am given some SME proposal dah and I was kinda blank while doing it. In fact there are still numbers of things that I don't really understand. I've been taught on most securities and documentations but no one specifically should expect me to know bout interest amendment very very well at the moment. How am I supposed to know what a 'NOT 100% FINANCING' means. Literally I understand lah but how am I supposed to know how to which documentation is required for this 'write up'. Lol.

Now that I'm starting to get involved SME and soon Corporate side, I'd be dealing with AO a lot. Phone call and e mails for queries. Tadi was my first time talking to an AO from Retail department and god, rude lah. I was asked to tell her to fax something back and she bluntly said 'dgr tu bri malas dealing sama Bsc ppl. Nda munasabah'. I was dumbstruck with her bluntness.

And then our manager kinda pissed off with us tadi and she asked us to get ready with an answer of what we gonna do with our work bla bla. I was like 'apa kan'. Irene and me kinda had a talk tadi and she even said 'you're unlucky to be here' and I spontaneously said 'it seems so'.

See, at times I'm happy with what I'm doing. I love the satisfaction I get of being productive. I just truly hate the headaches I got from the workloads,pressures and sometimes the environment. Lol.

I'm done complaining. And I'm yawning endlessly. Lol. Goodnight.

Oh yeah, A level result is coming out soon? Well, I just hope my result isn't truly bad.

Counting days.

2010-01-24T15:02:00.001Z

Heyy I'm here again. Just thought that I wanna blog briefly before I go to my lala land. ;)

Anyway, the weekend is over. Tomorrow would be the start of a new week and I do hope I'd have more good times than hard ones next week. Lol.

Anyway, my weekend? Really I kinda wanted to have leisure times yesterday tu. Doing things like watching dvds,reading story books and importantly waking up late. Haha. But nehh. My mom wake me at 8.05 am, telling me to get ready at 10. I could not get back to sleep. So I watched 'The Women'. Nice movie. To be specific feminine la story line nya. They do not focus on guys at all :p

Anyway, around tengahari I was reading a story book,having good time doing that when my mom and sister forced me to take H1N1 vaccination. I seriously wanted to be at home,bemalasing. Haha.

At night I sleptover at usu's crib and I woke up late tadi. Almost midday x. Haha. Slept at 3ish. :p in the afternoon my cousin's uncle came and I kinda do not find it awkward to be around them. Pasal friendly and funny. :D

What else? Ahh,sure there is something else. A guy asked me out. Surprising and unexpected. Out of blue lah brabis. I thought he was joking. But he kinda meant it. Anyway I declined it. I mean I know it may just be a date, not necessarily be something more but still, it is quite unwise to accept it:) I don't wanna get myself into an inappropriate mess. I freaked out okay when the guy texted me. Not that I was excited, more like bangang and didn't know how to respond. Haha. I kinda said yes at first since I thought it may sound rude to say NO. Haha. Seriously, it seems like I need people to know that I am quite lagging at responsing. I seem to require extra moments to let my brain digest the info before making decision. Haha.

A lil part of me wants to give it a try, I admit. I admit too that I do think that he is a bit cute. Butt nehh. He's a sweet candy which I'm sure eventually leads to toothache. Haha. Nice analogy. :p If I ever am going out for a date, at least let me be sure that the guy sincerely wants it and not just for the sake of temporary fun:)

Alright I'm off. Goodnight:)

Friday.

2010-01-21T15:11:00.001Z

I'm sleepy and tired. So I'm just gonna be randomly brief. Haha.

*Work isn't so bad today. Nothing wonderful or great. It's just how I take things? :p Ricky, I'm starting to think of him as my Baiduri Guardian? Haha.

*Had dinner with Vivi and Elza. Ate buttermilk chicken. Idk why this recently I keep on wanting to eat Buttermilk chicken. Lol. ;) Went to Kbox and had 5 songs. - Nidji song, Hapus Aku ; downloaded! :p

*Happy 31st monsaries to advv-belated:p Haha. I just wanna put this in my blog. Hehe. May Allah bless the two of ya! <3

* Have another written test on this coming Thurs. And yeah, I kinda want the post. ;)

*I wanna go outtttt. Wanna watch movies ohh.

*I'm not the type who actually say out my opinion, but then kindly don't simply make assumption or jump into conclusion.. I'm not a mind reader :)

*I'm gonna try my best to be ignorance as I can. Lol.

Last but least,goodnight peeps! :D

Not so great.

2010-01-19T14:37:00.002Z

I was kind of starting to think that Tuesday might be my lucky day since good things seemed to happen a lot on Tuesdays. Lol. Anyway, I have enough of superstitions stuff for now. Things are UNPREDICTABLE. Heh. Pissed off.

Anyway, I am absolutely okay at the moment. I wandered on my own after sending my sis to the cyber. I drove to the beach. I stayed outside Surau,listening to Azan and recital of few Surah. And I cried on my way to Tutong town again. I talked to myself. And less than 10 mins I felt better, a lot better. Then I went to Sg. Tutong,trying to recall the pictures of my dad. I was trying to have some sentimental moments when one guy shh-shh me. Like hello, can't I have some peace here? So I drove home. Taking the longer route and I simply noticed my mood improved a great deal. I even felt like I was over reacting.

*sigh. I would not rather call today as a great day because...well,it seemed like I failed to do most things right today. I'm just quite grateful that I have few people who can put my mind at ease. I'm talking about my work place of course. I'm glad to have Ricky, Wani,Ka Lela and Pei Juan to always make me feel at ease. I can be myself. Especially Ricky. Dude, I'm starting to think you'd be a wonderful co worker. *sigh. Does it hurt the others to make me feel comfortable? I was kinda glad that Irene texted me at fb this afternoon. She asked me how am I coping and that she has faith on me that I'd make it through. Yeah. That soothes me too anyway. She'll be back to work by next Monday.

Oh yeah, Elza gave me a mug. A cool mug! And the right size too. Haha. Sort of the one that I was looking for. Hehe. Thanks again Elza. ;D.

What else? Ahh. I wanna go out. Movie, beaching. Idk. Random things. I'm craving for 'fun'. Lol.

Bah I'm off. Need to do my sis essay. Hehe. She promised to iron my clothes for 4 days. Well, nothing comes free right? Most things ;)

One more thing, I wanna say Alhamdullilah cuz well..whatever obstacles I have, there are other ppl who suffer more than I do. Whatever I had so far might be just a bit of misery. Just a bit of the 'black' taste. So people be grateful. And show to those pitiful people, there are individuals who still care in this cruel world.

Goodnight. :)

Insert post.

2010-01-17T13:25:00.001Z

Eh I forgot one thing. Haha. I meant to include this one thing earlier but I forgot. :p

You see, a person gave me this cute keychain few months ago. Almost a year ago x. Lol. Anyway, there were few times that I wanted to get rid of it. I almost left it on purpose at Parking lot. And recently I almost gave it to my co worker. Lol. It isn't that I am pretty much affected with it. It did but not in a grieve or longing way. Even though the fact that it is a keychain, and small in size, I used to sleep with it.

Anyway, my lil sister played with it tadi. With my other keychains. And she lost it. And surprisingly I wasn't mad. And I'm quite glad with it. It doesn't bother me. Lol.

Heh. That's all I wanna share. I know sekadar ;)

Sunday~

2010-01-17T13:09:00.001Z

Salam~ I'm here again. I just feel like doing my usual random talks here. Heh. It's almost 9 and earlier I wanted to watch Hana Yori Dango. 4 more episodes to go. But then I am kinda sleepy now. Hoho.

Anyway I sleptover at my cousin's house yesterday. My uncle with his family from KK came to Brunei yesterday. We went to Bandar to meet them up. We as in my usu, grandma,my cousin and me. My mom didn't join us since she was working and my siblings were at school,obviously :p So we met up at Yayasan and my uncle treated us lunch. I ate dim sum. And I think dim sum sana inda nyaman oh. Hehe. Anyway, I got the chance to meet up my cousins from KK. Like I could not remember them and in fact I think I never met them kali. Haha. I just remember the youngest one. Well, me and my other cousin bullied him back in few few years ago. He didn't join his family yesterday,btw. Last time they came to Brunei,yes,I did see him. :)

We went home after hanging for a while at the hotel they were staying at, Kiulap Plaza hotel that is. I sleptover at Usu's cribs yesterday. X)

Today I went to a wedding ceremony at Tamu Serembangun with family. And then relatives from KB dropped by at our place to see my grandma. Anjang's family stayed longer tadi. Really they are sort of one of my favourite relatives. Anjang,they are kinda cool and it is always a pleasure to see them. :D.

Okay, I feel like talking lagi but no, I better be off. Hana Yori Dango of course. :p

Goodnight:)

I hope tomorrow would be a good day. I'm being paranoid and been feeling insecure these recently. That is truly unhealthy and I'm getting sick of feeling that way. Heh.

Private Blog~

2010-01-15T08:57:00.001Z

I am making this blog private till I don't know. When I feel like exposing it lah lagi. Lol. I feel like I was not so free to say out things that I wanna say these days. So yeah, only invited readers are allowed to read my boring and lame talks. Haha. Anyway, this private stuff, it won't be forever. heh.

So, I had a written test this morning at PTE Katok. A SPA written test for a clerk post. And nth, mcm talur lah rasaku test nya tu. ;p I memorised Ministers' names, Bruneian Traditional stuffs, you know, the MIB stuff andddd none come out. haha. Adalah, I was asked to list down nama nama Kementerian di Brunei. And yang lain tu, I don't know, more or less like general questions. hehe. like what is TPOR stands for*not that I know, then, normal working hours for government workers, sequence of Islamic months and one simple Maths question. Hehe. And and converting Tulisan rumi ke Jawi. haha. Anyway, I am not hoping to get that job. It isn't something that I want. In fact, I can't truly see where my future is heading but whereever it leads, it won't be a dead end. Dead end is only when I am giving up and not putting any effort. In other words, dead end is equal to 'stop living'. =)

What else ah? I think I got something else to say but heh, I forgot already. I'd blog about it when I remember. Oh by the way, I am currently using flats. haha. And yeah I feel kinda weird. I am so used to heels. haha. I am so going to change into heels after this. I'm gonna pick my sister and we will buy a birthday cake for Farah. I am still thinking whether I'd say something to her mom or not later about last Wednesday. I know I should not say a word but it's tempting. I hate it when I can't have my own say. I kinda have enough of it, all these years. Shutting my mouth and keeping things to myself though it hurts my ego and self esteem.

Alright, I think I am done blogging. Till next post. Later at night I plan to watch DVD and tomorrow going to the kiddos school and see a doctor. I'd like to have another checkup for my unbalance hormones and period. =)

Last but not least, good day people. I know it keeps on raining but still, try not to make it more gloomy for ourselves. lol. What am I saying? The rain is okay when..you know, if I am to stay in house for the whole day, the whole weeks and the whole time. lol.

Blogging.

2010-01-12T14:21:00.002Z

It's rainy and I like the sound of it. Why? For me nyaman tidur. Lol. Btw, hi and salam. :) I'm not gonna blog much. Just gonna say about few few things.
:)

My day was okay tadi. Kinda. Though someone said something,err not so nice and polite to me. The way that person talk tadi really got my nerve. Sound underestimating. Anyway, good thing, fine I'd prove myself not that dummy. Hello~

Next, I'm NOT going to the annual dinner after all. Good thing it was possible to cancel my name from the list. I'm sure the function would be wonderful and etc etc but I don't feel right to make my mom drive on that night. Plus my uncle's family from KK is coming over to our place. So,yeah. I chose not to come. :)

Next, charade car. Yeah. It has 'come home' already. Not fully 'healthy'. Still needs to replace the sensors, which each one approximately costs around $400ish. Multiply that with 4. Gila kan? That small car costs a huge amount of $$$. Lol.

What else? Oh yeah, it is still early of month but I could not help doing mental list as what to buy by the end of the month. Well,technically I know I could not get all the stuffs in one go saja. So I'd think lagi. Lol. But one thing for sure, I wanna do my hair. My natural curly hair that I'm trying to get back? Well, I give up. :)

Oh yeah, my cousin spontaneously suggested about going outside the country on the 30th or 31st of this month. And I like it. And I'm positive my sis and I can make it. ;)

Then what else? Ah, I can't wait to watch Hana Yori Dango. My cousin found the Cd already. And and I am going to get the copy of Supernatural series jua. Hehe. Thanks to my cuzie's bf. :D. And I bought dvds lagi tadi though my dvds alum abis beliat :/

Alright. I'm done blogging. Goodnight people.

Typical Monday.

2010-01-11T14:24:00.002Z

It's another Monday. Good news, I didn't go snappish to anyone today. Good thing. :) But I don't know. I just got this feeling..of,well something just bothers me. Feels like something is not done. I am supposed to be doing something but I don't feel like doing it. Lol.

Oh yeah. Tadi I got my kain stuck arah something under seat Elza'r car,I fell and got my kain wet. And yeah, I was extremely worried that it was some kind of sign or omen. It's not that I am pretty much a superstitious person. I guess I worried too much. Paranoid. *sigh. I apply the 'expect for the worst' principle in my daily life. My theoritical reasoning? Well, to get myself ready for any bad outcomings and if thing do not turn up so badly,well then I can smile hugely for the whole day. Lol.

Tadi was my first time sending documents alone to Block A. And the corporate people,well they were not so welcoming I see that I started to think something like 'ahh,nice'. But then the girl at Loan Center and two people from Credit department,they did make me feel welcome. And I thought the corporate people are the most friendly when I was with Irene and Ka Dygku. Whatever.

My work,I was doing another ARCHIVE and some facilities documentations today. I was to have my lunch at 12 tadi. My lunch time is usually at 1. Anyway, I didn't have my lunch tadi. I didn't feel like lunch-ing in the pantry and perhaps alone tadi. Plus I ate something before that.

Hmm, I'm bored. I talk less in the office and that bothers me too. I can only communicate well with few people. It bothers me that I have to control my behaviour at times and to certain people.

I'm off. I'm done complaining. At least having tasks to do gives me some kind of satisfaction.

Goodnight.

I don't feel like sleeping yet.

Sleepoverrrr~

2010-01-10T02:40:00.001Z

Hey Salam~and Good morning. =D I am doing multi-things at the moment. Blogging, deleting my 1982 email-mostly notification from FB of course, reloading video-videos that people tagged me on FB which I ridiculously JUST noticed yesterday when I wanted to watch the video Eham made. Lol and youtube stuff. I am watching Hana Yuri Dango. It is the original and Japanese version of Boys Over Flowers and Meteor Garden. I am not done with episode one. and I am thinking to sambung liat krg. Hehe. I don't have to worry of not getting to watch it sampai habis like I did to You're Beautiful because my cousin had his boyfriend burnt the drama arah CDs so no worries. haha. Lol.

I was so excited yesterday at the thought of going to JPMC for jacuzzi, sauna and steam bath, Looking forward berabis lah. I wanted to pamper my overweight body nie. So was my cousin. And and it only occured to me the night before yesterday to make a call and make sure the facilities are available. I called JPMC early yesterday's morning and find out that all the desirable facilities ARE under RENOVATION. haha. We could always go to other places but JPMC is the only cheapest place and preferable place at the moment. Other place like it costs $15-ish for sauna alone. So campur-campur, jadinya inda berbaloi. haha. I don't mind if I currently have lots of cash :p So, jacuzzi stuffs, next time. Which is in February.

So we heaed home saja tarus. Usu picked me up after work anyway.We had lunch, despite I had a 6 pieces of chicken nuggets and a packet of Chips from McDonald while at the office. Heh. We met up with my mother lagi sekajap at workshop Tutong and I gave her the langsat that I bought last to days, which I almost forgot to bring home lagi yesterday. Lol and we wnet straight to Bukut Beruang. Hehe. At 7 ish we went to my house because Usu wanted to see Grandma and Usu laki and Usu Bini went to KB for 'Bachelor party' *I don't know what is the right word. Basically the type of function where people have the karaoke stuffs before the marriage ceremony the next day nya. LOL. My cousin and me stayed at home and she cooked Mee Hoon. I assisted her, assisting masak telur lah. kira tolong jua. ;P

We planned to have dinner and watch DVDs. We even chose what dvd to watch dah. Kali apanah, we were talking about my outfits for the coming anual dinner and we ended up 'playing' make over game. haha. We did not watch any dvd, obviously:P

Hehe. I think I am done talking. Those videos should be done reloading dah.

I smelled food. Haha. God, usu masak nyaman~ haha. lol. Oh yeah, Elza and Vivi are coming over to my place later. Elza wanted to show us the video she made. hehe. I will try not to get home too late later. They are going back to Uni tomorrow and me, what else, working. lol.:)

Okay then, take care, Till next post~ Good day people!!

Tuesday.

2010-01-05T13:57:00.001Z

Salam peeps. I'm blogging again. Hehe. Despite I'm feeling kinda sleepy and my baju for esok belum berterikah. If malas malas I'd use jubah lagi x suk. Haha. Liat dulu. :p

Anyway, I didn't have any OT tadi but still I went home late pasal my mom wanted to buy some more school stuffs for the kiddos. Initially I was tempted to have another silly tantrum and thank God someone somehow reminded me of how I would have felt if I lost my temper. Hehe. You know who you are, thank you! :D

Plus the day was quite nice to be spoiled by my silly tantrum. Heh. I enjoyed working earlier. I learnt more stuffs tadi on SME security and I got to finalise some FOL. And I wasn't so shy tadi. Like aku inda diam2 mcm selalu masa lunch. I think pasal there were two malay women tadi jua. And anyway, my so called 'prediction' that I'd lose some weight while working..well mcm..mcm..nda menjadi. Haha. I never thought to mention this but yeah, cupboard behind me tu is the place where people put their food on. Food like keropok, roti, cakes, sweets, chocs and etc etc. And Irene teased me tadi ckp 'asal u pusing kerusi u ambil, u dri toilet u ambil, u berdiri u ambil, u printng u ambil'. Haha. I DID NOT notice that myself. Damn it. Mental lah ku tadi. And apa nah, tadi ada that ice cream yg bejual ara kereta ah, Idk apa nama nya but yeah, I joined jua durang membeli the ice cream. Lol.

I need to be aware of my diet now. The annual dinner is next weekkk. Hoho. I haven't figured out what to wear and etc etc. Anyway, will do a serious thinking with my cousin on coming sat ne. Haha. I'm looking forward to the jacuzzi stuffs. Wanna pamper my body. Lol.

Hmm, alright I want to stop already. Sorry if I bore ya with this random post. Anyways, goodnight :)

Just someone's words, 'God won't give us something we could not handle'. I find this helpful when I'm facing some obstacles. Another one, a common line, I believe in karma. Karma isn't a bad thing, nor necesserily a good thing. It is just one of the things that helps us to 'balance' things out and give us some sort of peace in mind. :)

Monday.

2010-01-04T14:44:00.001Z

I'm getting ready to go to bed. Just thought wanna blog briefly. Lols. Anyway, I officially hate Monday. Haha. I tried not to say this out loud. Keeping in my mind that I'd have a bad week if I say something like this. Heh. LOL.

Last Monday pun I was moody. Way too moody that I acted unreasonably selfish and jerk. Today... Well at least my mood wasn't so bad mcm last week. Not in my worst mood but still I could not help being unreasonable. And expectedly, I easily 'detect' one's mistake and teingat balik things that people had done to me. Haa. Lame. Lol. Whatever.:)

Anyway, I am being unreasonable to a person tadi. Selfish too. I'm not proud of what I did. In fact, I'm ashamed. But I'm just stupidly ego to admit my wrongs and make it up with her. Way way too silly. It is hard to say sorry to a person you really love. For me at least. Gosh. Now, here I am again, feeling like crying due to shame and guilty, regretting doing some silly stuffs. Idiotic much. Huh.

Okay whatever. I made an idiotic and disgraceful act. And I'm just too stupidly and disgustingly ego to apologise. So I would just have to swallow this guilty buldging feeling.

Haish. This silly tantrum, this is something that I never truly reveal to most people. I am rational enough to foresee what would happen when I carry out my tantrum to them. Imagine, how would you feel when you didn't mean to come late to see me and then I got annoyed and purposedly make you wait for me lama2? That is the kind of thing that I tried not to do to my friends mostly. I don't think I ever did that. Though there are times when I almost lost temper to few people that I have always considered as my 'good' people. But nehh, that would be suck. So just 'shut up'.

I'm not truly bad mood lah. Just..err,moodswing? Haha. Lol. It bothers me when I couldn't be entirely truthful bout something. Makes me feel like I'm some sort of a hypocrite. Lol.

Okay enough with the 'snappish' talk. Let see, something to look forward to. Heh. Coming Sat I'm going to pamper myself with jacuzzi and etc etc with my cousin. I'm going to sleepover at her house tarus. Hehe. I loike this one. Saya rindu kucing2 sekalian~ haha. And and jua, talking and doing some 'crazy' stuffs with my cousin. Wawaw.

Bah, I better stop. I wanna be energetic tomorrow. Goodnight then! ;)

Just an insert post

2010-01-03T15:34:00.001Z

Haha. Okay, I just read Vivi's blog and her post is a lot better than mine and more 'emotions'. Haha. And that somehow makes me forget for a while the tiredness that I feel. LOL.

I just wanna say the outing was fun. Especially Ilham's part. Haha. Aku malas cerita in detail what we did tadi but yeah though I'm sure Eham isn't reading my blog, but yeah buddy, we 'adore' you. Haha.

Bahh, adang, I better go to sleep. I don't wanna be tired tomorrow. I hope I won't have to do any OT tomorrow. Wanna get home a bit earlier. Hee. Oh yeah talking about job thingy, I forgot to mention, I was offered a job at a private school somewhere last week. Umm, haven't I mentioned it yet before? I forgot. Heh. Anyway, I declined the offer. I love teaching. Yup I do. :) And few days after that I received a letter asking me to sit for a written test for a government post on the 15th. Well, it is a good thing but frankly it isn't something that I really want.. Huhu. But still I won't purposedly antam2 the test nanti. ;)

What else? Heh. As you know vivi sleptover at my house semalam and yeah, I admit now I am missing a person. Missing only. I do not go 'nuts' bout it or him. Lol. I miss being his 'personal google'. Miss him describing me 'weird but in a good way'. Craving for those silly argument and fantasies talking. Especially the captain part, lala land. Haha. Wherever he is and whatever he is up to, I pray and wish him the best. :D

Tup tup. I need to shut up and tidur now. Bye bye. Hehe. This time for real ;)

2010's first outing with friends x)

2010-01-03T15:04:00.002Z

I'm quite tired but still I wanna update my blog. Heh. Cuz I know if I don't I'd kumpul2 the story and when I blog it'd be..err,emotion-less? Lol. Whatever:p

Anyway, I watched movie again today. This time with fellow friends. 2010's first outing with friends. Hehe. Advv and me ikut Elza. Vivi sleptover at my place semalam. Hehe. Nadzri and Ewan were supposed to join us but then Muaz's mom wanted to treat them makan jua. And Muaz wanted to watch Sherlock Holmes at Q-lap mall. :) So, inda jadi lah. The four of us went to the airport initially to send Jia Shin off. We met Peiyi and Wansing. :D And yes we are so gonna have a gathering before Wan Sing goes back to Ausie in this coming February! X)

Anyway, our movie was to start at 4 and we arrived kinda early tadi. So we went to the arcade to kill the time. We had numbers of songs arah arcade lama tadi. And seriously we have difficulty in choosing the songs. Lol. We kinda wished Eham awal sampai tadi. The arcade stuffs would be a lot fun with him around. Heh. We kinda complained lah tadi that it had been a while nda hang out with Eham. December outing with him? NIL! Haa. We missed him and for me at least I admit I was kinda jauh hati when he didn't reply my text masa I invited him to come to my place for my dad's tahlil function. Like I was expecting a notification at least. Heh. Anyway, I'm so over it. Meeting him tadi simply erased all the jauh hati stuffs. Haha. I knew I won't be able to be truly mad jua. And plus he did look 'guilty' when we 'scolded' him tadi. Haha.

We watched Old Dogs tadi by the way. It was funny. Nice movie lah. I RECOMMEND people watch it. Haha. After the movie,we went to kbox lagi. With Eham this time. And guess who we bumped into d sana? Oshin...! With Raiyan. Hehe. He is seriously cute and adorable. It is his first birthday today. Advv,Elza and me bought a cute baju with trousers for him. We hope it isn't too big for him. Hehe. Other than Oshin, Elza and me also bumped into Zaim QS. Hehe. Me and Elza miss him. Haha. We always miss him I think. :P.

What else? Oh yeah, Zaim and Apet and Eham's friends joined us watching movie too. Nadz, Ewan, Muaz and Kay came to the Mall but sekajap saja kami nampak durang. Lol.

Pfff. I'm sleepyy dah. Hehe. So enough talking. Goodnight. X)

Oh yeah, I want to sleepover at my cousin's houseee. Hehe. Wanna talk with her sampai pagi. Haha.

2010.

2009-12-31T17:43:00.001Z

It's 2010 already? Yeah. It is. Haha. Lol. Time flies so fast. I barely notice it. Hehe. Anyway before I reminisce what I've gone through LAST YEAR, lemme just do some recaps about recent stuffs briefly. Hehe.

First of all, Happy Belated birthday to my sister and Zar. May Allah bless you two :) We had a small party for my sis birthday at my usu's house. My sis likes the gifts we gave her. Hehe. We made a collection for the event. My sis got a picture frame-supposedly hadiah eksen2. Haha. But the frame looks good anyway. Then, flats for her and a special one,my dad's picture to be put in the frame:)

What else aa,hah. Kmbing. Now I quite forget the things that I wanna blog. I did want to blog but I always postponed and postpones due to tiredness and exhaust from working. Mcm I always get out of the office after 5. And recently I stayed at the office till 7.30 to finish some things up. I felt tired. I do. But somehow I kinda feel some kind of satisfaction having OT and stuffs. Lol. Idk. Just the type of feeling you have when you do something productive. :)

So anyway,again, it is the first day of Jan 2010. Haha. Still digesting. I spent New Year's eve with my siblings,usu and Elza. Usu asked Elza to joined us since we got transport problem. Hehe. And usu treated us tadi,both movies and meal. Thank you for the treat usu! :D And thanks to Elza jua:) We watched Avatar tadi. And it was quite awesome. Like though lama but inda boring lah. Nice. Nice movie,place,world. Haha. Apakan~ Anyway Pandora isn't a place I really want to be in. :P. I don't think I can survive. Haha.

What else? Ahh,we had a end of year lunch tadi at Sheraton Hotel. It was a bit fun but I could not really feel that way. Not when I was worried with my unfinished tasks. Heh.

New year. Haha. Yuh,face it, you're in 2010 dah. Haha. I haven't set my resolution. Well just a lil pray hoping that this year would be a better and blissful year:) amiin. 2009, I won't say it was a bad year. Initially I had a number of situations. But then I do think life is getting better after all the bad things. 2009 was just another phase to archieve maturity. Hehe. Problems,they are inevitable. It depends on how we tackle them. :)

I think I'd stop. Haven't had my prayers and ngantuk dah. Haha. I'll blog tomorrow x lagi.

Oh yeah, we made a spontaneous plan tadi. Me and dear friends will watch movie on coming Sun.:D Allowance durg keluar jua dah. Haha.

Another thing jua, thanks to angah hjh and her daughters for the book and bag. Hehe.

Okay then HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Drama.

2009-12-27T15:27:00.002Z

Salam. It is 11 pm and I'm going to bed after this. I haven't ironed my clothes and I don't have to. I promised to buy my sis a chocolate if ia iron kan baju ku. Haha. Malas jua ku sudah tu. Heh.

Anyway, I know I tend to talk a bit more about people in my family life thingy and yes I wanna say something lagi. Well, everyone has their own drama kan? :) Anyway, I have this aunt that I kinda detest very much at the moment and I'm kinda hoping that I somehow would get a chance to give her some piece of mind. Let her dumb brain digest the fact of how much she irritates the hell out of me. Ada hajat tu manis ckap nya. How dare you use family bond to make me or my mom give you what you want? That is so lame and sickening. Haish. I so don't love you or you children,okayy? Do have some dignity:) Sick culture. Eh salah, sick people.

Haha. Okay. I sound sasak and rude? Haha. Au, I am. This is how I talk when I'm sasak. And there are some other people that also make my mind go nuts and aku malas cakap. Buat benda inda baik inda berkat. I'm not being alim and ironic here. It's just generally true. That applies to me jua. Whatever. Better talk about something else.:)

Umm, tadi I went to a wedding ceremony with durang usu and we went to Bandar to do a 'special? shopping for someone's birthday. Lol. And I enjoyed myself tadi with my cousin. We excitedly talked about our plan during the wedding function and somehow plan tu inda menjadi,due to 'carelessness'. Haha. Anyway, we have a back up plan for that special event. Hehe.

Advv came to my house while I was still at Bandar. They waited for me and I talked to durang sekajap saja rasa ku. I mean Addie lah. Haha. They told me about Jia Shin's party. ^o^. Anyway after that Vivi's dad wanted to treat us dinner but Addie Fadlie dalenk c Vivi tara mau ikut. Heh. So it was vivi and me saja. And vivi's dad is quite cool. :)

What else? I'm quite tired and kinda craving for more holidays. Lol. And I'd only get it next week. Hoho. I miss durang Kubert the cats and I wanna watch dvd. I wanna sleepover ara my cousin. I wanna watch movies. I wanna shop. I wanna get myself heels. I wanna put more and more money in my banks. Haha. Okay I'm mumbling. Ngantuk dah. Hehe.

So goodnight. :)

2010. Few days to go.

2009-12-26T12:06:00.001Z

I'm home and I'm key-less. Haa. Kambing. I should make another duplicate of my house key x to avoid this in the future. Heh. This is the second ka or the third. Can't remember. But surely this isn't the first. Lol. Anyway, just to kill the time and boredom, I decided to blog la :)

It's 26th today. Few more days to go before we reach 2010. And Idk. Still have time to think about the so called new year revolution. Heh. Really. We, majority, hardly do and mean the things we said every year tu. Like this yr I'm gonna bla bla bla, nehh. We normally nda buat pun. Nda ja? Lol. So, just go with the flow and pray that next year would be a better year than this year:)

What else? Let me just recall few things. Yesterday my family had a Tahlil function for my dad at my house. I didn't invite lots of friends. Just Vivi, Elza, Addie, Eham and Cqens. And last minute, Nadzri. Only three came anyway. Addie said he needed to take care of his sister:) Alhamdulilah the function went quite well. Ada jua lah part part annoying and aku malas ckp. :)

My cousin is home btw. I mean for real. Haha. She graduated on the 16th and this time if wanna go out no time limits lah. Haha. We don't have to rush apa. We have lots and lots of time. Hehe. We were supposed to do a special shopping today. But we would do it tomorrow most probably ^^ and on the day she arrived, which is on Thursday, we went to Abg Anip's house for Doa Selamat function. And I met Diana from Baiduri HR and we chatted la. My cousin knows her jua. Hehe.

So I went home a bit later than I planned and informed my mom tadi. Said I'd get home before 5. But nehh. I reached home at almost 7 x anddddd nada org d rumah. So I waited outside like for half an hour baru tah my mom picks me up. Haha. Vivi was right, baik plg I stayed arah rumah nya tadi msa balik tu. Haha. But I didn't know jua kan. Heh.

Haha. Talking about the person, she called just now telling me ia ke rumah with Addie. Aduy. They didn't know my mom pick me up tadi. Thanks babe and to gendut mu jua for being concern. Hehe. ;))

I'll be home shortly and I'll have my shower,prayers, laundry and dvdddd. Haha. I bought another one tadi. Yesterday jua. But inda jua beliat. I ended up chatting with Vivi and Elza semalam. Hehe.

So I'd be off now. Take care people ;)

Oh yeah, I got a cute 'garfield' car pillow for d xmas exchange gift. Haha. Okay la though I was hoping for chocs:p lol

Xmas :)

2009-12-24T11:22:00.001Z

Salam, I'm waiting for my usu to pick me up. We are going to Abg Anip's Doa Selamat Function. :) I felt like blogging last night but I was way too exhausted.

Yesterday afternoon I was left by Irene. Haha. Lol. I mean she is currently on leave till 29th and hence I am to do my work with refering to my notes first. I was a bit worried when my supervisor gave me a proposal to do yesterday but okay lah. I made errors jua. But alhamdullilah,nothing major. :) And I'm coping better. I'm getting to know some of them. I don't really feel awkward or shy anymore communicating with them. Hehe. And another thing, they call me 'Hana' . I wasn't really used to it at first. Only after three or four times kena panggil baru tah respond. Lol.

Eh wait, I almost forgot one major thing to share. Haha. I came to work late tadi due to our car broke down near at highway near to Bkt Agok. And yes I was panic, tense and worried of arriving work that late. But then okay lah. No one scolded me, plus I already informed my supervisor :) That charade car is at workshop at the moment and next week we would have to let the car agent check jua. Mahal kali. But no choice. :0.

Anyway, yesterday was pay day. I knew that but I malas check my account brapa saja my salary,knowing that it won't be much. Heh. But tadi I checked tah jua ara computer system after my co worker mentioned it to me. And haha, my dreams of getting heels and bags this month trabang jua~my current salary isn't byk.

Eh eh, I gotta go now. Hehe. Bye.

Second day of working.

2009-12-21T13:57:00.001Z

Hello and Salam:) I have done the laundry, had my solat and iron my clothes for tomorrow. Andd tulang ku mcm sakit. Haha. I guess that probably because I was rushing finishing things up. Lol.

We,my family and myself, went to Gadong for a while to buy some food for dinner after picking me up from work. And hence we went home a bit late than I wished we would have been. :)

Anyway, second day of working..well, it was okay. Just I felt myself not being totally active. I learnt something new today. And at the last minute, almost 5pm, I was given my very first task. And at first I was kinda forgot which is which. Lame :s Irene promises to give me some more stuffs to do while she is on leave from 24th-29th. And I just remember that I haven't bought
a gift to be exchanged for the christmas. And and the new workers were informed about annual dinner on the coming 16th Jan next year. The theme was something like going back to school. So the dress code would be something like professor and etc. I put my name at first and cancelled it after knowing Wani won't be going. But then Diana from HR,the one who interviewed me, she persuaded me to come. She called me when knowing I wasn't planning to come. Huhu. Okay, my soon to be 2nd annual dinner. Another thing, I created a Baiduri account and got myself an atm card. My very first one. Lol.

Okay, those things sound kinda a bit cool I think.. But then I'm not sure whether I could adapt the whole thing that soon. I haven't truly mingled with my co workers. Most of them are chinese. So I mostly hold my tongue. Except when with Irene of course. The others,they are okay. They are not mean,no they are certainly not, they are just fine. I just don't know very well to approach people I guess. Lol. Anyway, I'm not miserable. Nehh, nda la. In fact I'm starting to think this kind of environment is an optimum one. That is the right definition of working. Self-dicipline. Haha. Okay, what am I talking about? ;)

I better stop. I actually wanted to watch a dvd. One of the reasons why I rushed tadi. But mcm ngalih. Heh. So, goodnight:)

Eternal lost.

2009-12-20T15:48:00.001Z

I was watching TV after finished recalling the stuffs that I have learnt on last Thurs..when a text distracted me..

One of my dad's close friends, Uncle Razak, texted me up.. He remembers today is a whole year without him. I am touched with his text. He remembers. He is sad. I don't know but his text somehow hits me. I am feeling sentimental, yes, hell I do..

I'm off to bed. Good night..

Random things.

2009-12-20T05:06:00.001Z

A year without him. A year without my beloved dad. I barely notice how fast time goes. I still can remember on this very same date last year. I could still recall the scenes,pictures,expressions and emotions.

I'm not being corny here. There is that tingly sentimental feeling and yet to cry or mourn doesn't seem right. Life goes on. I have stopped feeling extremely sad on thinking that he is not here today to be in the picture. My first salary, driving, my lil siblings growing up... The grief comes and goes. It is normal to picture how it would have been if he is still with us today. I miss him, we miss him, even Vivi said she misses him. Thanks to her and Addie for keeping me company on that night till the next day. And also those Samaritans for being there. :) Most importantly my families. Words are hardly enough.. Thanks for being a true family for us, especially nini,usu,sis Nurul, ngangah's family:) and to some other families from my father's side. Those who only managed to proove themselves as real ones,strictly speaking. No offence. :)

The shocks, miseries and griefs on that day, I shan't forget. Especially the hopes. Our hopes that he did survive, we have found him earlier and desperately, hoping that it was his joke. The desire to see him popping out of the trees and wondering to us what was the fuss all about. I know that seemed illogic. But again, logic barely matters when you are desperate.

Alright. I'm gonna stop here. Till next post then..

Last but not least, may Allah bless my dad's soul. Amiin. Al-Fatihah.

First day. ;)

2009-12-17T15:17:00.001Z

I'm a bit tired and perhaps sleepy. Hehe. Anyway, it was my first day working at Baiduri Business Services Centre (BSC). Haha. Okay, frankly speaking, I was extremely nervous earlier. I didn't feel hungry though I hadn't taken any food. I even said to my mom 'Balik tah ma, nda ku jadi keraja'. Haha. Exaggerating much.

Anyway there were two other new staffs starting today jua. Ricky and Wani, wani turns out to be Oshin's cousin. She is friendly and talkative. So we approached each other quite easily. And the staffs were okay. Most of them are friendly and they seem rather professional. ;) I am put under FOL team. FOL stands for facility of loan-i think so. Heh. And I think it is quite cool. I learn few things. Like third party, first party, legal charge,documentation required in loaning. Haha. It is cool and yet confusing jua lah. Hehe. My teacher is Irene, she's like so friendly and a good tutor. Funny too and I enjoy learning things with her tadi. :)

I'm quite tired now. And quite blank. Hehe. In a nut shell, I didn't have a bad start. It was just a good one. Lol. I'm off now. :) Goodnight

Some stuffs.

2009-12-16T06:17:00.001Z

Hi. I'm here again. I just got home. And I feel a bit sleepy now. Heh. I woke up early this morning to accompany my Uncle to BIA and Diplomatic place. It was my first time going there. And briefly, I was impressed a bit with the entrance door at the Diplomatic place and the not normal lift elavator. The entrance door tu will only open with magnetic pass made with sensor while the escalator,well, I don't know how to describe it but something mcm chambers. Haha. Okay. Whatever :p

Anyway I meant to blog something last night. But I was too sleepy after chatting with Elza. Hehe. Anyway, I was in a generous and rational mood last night. And a person texted me saying congrates for getting a place at Baiduri. Among all people he is one person I less likely expect to text me that. I mean I never thought he would know. I never thought of him at all. He was indeed the first person who greeted me on my birthday but I technically did not count it in as my phone clock show it was few minutes before 12. So few minute advance does not count. Plus I did not prefer having him as the first greeter. LOL! Anyway I didn't reply his text masa tu and last night jua buttt I said thanks to him on msn. Just being nice. Lol. And he was being friendly and I tried to be as warm as I can. But I'm weak at pretending. So I gave up and said ' Okay, this is awkward. Don't u think so?'. And he said something like ia phm and its okay and bla bla and I can take my time to be ready or even meet him up,'as a fren'. Well, I told him I prefer not. Wait, I wasn't being bitchy okay. I told him that politely. And indeed I told him I do not hate and detest him that much anymore. It is just we cannot undo things. And those things he did and said to me,especially behind my back, I shall never forget them. The part he indirectly said that one day I'd ask back for our friendship and ask favor from him despite ia 'sabar' with my so called bad doings. That holds me back. Well, I'm sorry-not entirely sorry though, this is just me. I hardly forget some things. I was about to include the line 'let's just pretend we never knew each other' but I thought that might offend his ego. So I just told him goodbyes and I wish him happiness and we both have our own lives and that it seems impossible to forget the things he did and said even if I want to. Really I cannot foresee any friendship intimacy between us in the future. And yes I don't think much of him nowadays. Like.. I simply don't give a damn. Ia happy ka, sad ka, I barely feel a thing. None of my bloody business. Moreover, I was never deeply in love with him after all. Bitter and ironic. Yet that is a piece of truth. :)

Okay enough about him. Part of me wishes he would read this post so things are clear. Hence any fakeness and hypocrisy can be avoided. Lol.

So I'd start working tomorrow. And I need to find out whether on Friday I'd have work or inda. If inda Vivi and Elza wish to sleepover at my place. ;)

Alright. Till next post. Good day people:)

Ironic.

2009-12-15T09:30:00.001Z

I had my second interview this morning at Baiduri headquarter at Kiarong. And ever since after the interview my heart beats inconstantly. Inconsistently. The interview was okay. A bit lame since there were few questions I didn't manage to answer well. Lol. The Baiduri business centre's supervisor was one of the interviewer. She's a chinese. Strict. The type of bos you don't want to mess with. Lol. The other one was the lady who interviewed me during the first session.

Anyway, the strict chinese lady is soon gonna be my supervisor. So soon. Yes, I was offered a job there at the Business centre department as a part timer dulu. Starting on this Thurs. They called me at 2pm at first but I didn't notice my hp ran out of credit so they couldn't reach me at first. Well, I kinda had an instinct that they would offer me a job after the interview. And well, it was weird yet true that I wasn't gloating happily about the whole thing. I should have been jumping happily but I went..err..a bit gloomy. Ironic indeed. Wanting a job was what I really wanted ever since last few weeks? And I'm not so eager now? Oh I know why, first I was warned that working in Business centre means lots of workloads,pressures,urgent works, over times and bla bla. And second of all, I will have to quit my teaching job. They mentioned it during the interview. Yta makanya aku down. I love teaching and I had to let it go. And I haven't told Uncle Din. Anyway, I just hope I'd be okay nanti. Amiin. Amiin.

Aha. Okay, now I feel better, the slightest bit. May Allah always bless me. :)

Alright I've talked enough. A small thing annoyed me JUST NOW. Lol. Okay, I'm a bit nervous so I'm bound to feel irritated ,unpredictably. ;)

Good day people.

Darn it~

2009-12-14T18:00:00.001Z

It is 1.38 AM. I need to wake up EARLY later. For second Baiduri interview. And I fucking couldn't get a sound sleep. *Forgive me for the usage of f word. Heh. It isn't everyday I use that. Thought I wanna try. Haha. Telur.

I went to bed early tadi. Around 9 ish? Almost 10 lah. And I didn't sleep well tadi. I dreamt about Pirates of Caribbean. Lol. Jack Sparrow and Davy Jones. What were they doing in my dream, I just couldn't really recall. Heh.

There were two messages on my phone when I checked it tadi. From my dearest cousin. Honestly, it is her faith on me that really soothes me in most situations. Hehe. When my confidence and self esteem are about to shatter I reach her and crave for the faith she has on me. I only stopped-almost-worrying about the baiduri thingy after texting her on fb. :)

What else? Umm, last time Sheikh talked to me, we mostly talked about relation thingy and I was a bit heran when he told me not to give up. Haha. I'm not giving up. I simply do not have the interest at the moments:) Yesterday I reread some of my post on fb and well, I smiled realizing I put someone's lines on most of them. I mean the recent ones. 'Weird but in a good way', 'Talking to you is never boring' and etc.. These lines used to put a smile on my face and make my mind go happy doppy. Lol. And now, they just give me that tingly feelings of past memories. Another closed chapter. Not a happy one, nor a sad one. If I ever get the chance, I'd love to let this someone know how grateful I am that he indirectly assisted me to get over a person, someone who I thought I couldn't live without:) We had good laughs and talks. I learnt something from him too. I learn how to 'make people sick of me'. Haha. Joke2.

I feel like talking more but NO, krg nyasal. Haha. I better be off now. Wish me luck for later! ;)

p/s: people barely appreciate us when we hardly appreciate ourselves :)

Officially broke.

2009-12-11T13:03:00.002Z

I'm officially broke. So I'm just going to be at home after this. HAHA. I doubt that. :p hehe. Anyway, Elza and me had lunch with some Jbu babes today. Hehe. Ka Deej, Wani, Nurul and Ayu that is. We lunch out at Yayasan. ;) I was a bit thrilled to see Nurul's and Ayu's buldging stomachs. Haha. That simply shows how lama dah I hadn't met them.

After lunch Elza and me went to the office to meet the others. We actually planned to go there before lunch but we took off late tadi. Hehe. Anyway I am truly glad to see the others. Haha. Especially John,Zaim, Ka Deena and Ka Mass. We promised John to come to his house on Chinese new year next year. Hehe. Zaim sarcastically gave me compliment saying I look thinner, haha. Ka Mas and ka Deena said I look berisi :p And nurul told me ' those who told that u're fat are just trying to put u in misery and envy that u're happy'. Haha. I'm not gonna take that seriously and yet it simply makes me laugh. Love her 'positive' thinking. :p heh. I am happy to go there. It was good to see them. I didn't actually expect to get a warm welcome from some people. And well,they welcome me warmly. Hehe. And God, seeing some of them with buldging tommy make me wanna laugh silly. Haha. Like, lama wah na jumpa durang. :'D. Can't wait to hang out with them. Mr baldy aka zaim, looking forward for his sarcasm:p

Anyway, after Jbu, we went to the Mall. I was looking for Pirates of Carribean dvd and yeah I got it finally but not arah Chong Hock. Heh. We went to K box and had 4 songs. After that we went to Swensen's for ice cream. Hehe. Andd we headed to Tutong after that. At Hua ho we bumped into Mirus and Limah. ;) Then,finally we went home. Heh. As simple as that :p

What else? I wanna watch dvd but I gotta do my mom's POA first. Thank God I've had my prayers and done the laundry. Or else I'd be tense x given a last minute task. Heh.

So, I better stop. Finish the Poa and then I can watch dvds :D. Goodnight people.

p/s: it was easy to ignore that particular person rupanya. Lol.

And I got two chocs tadi. Hehe. Thanks Ayu and Ka Deena. Dark chocs, my fav. Heh.

Simple outing ;)

2009-12-09T13:05:00.003Z

I had my prayer, had my shower and now I am free to watch DVD. Haha. Not. I have to do laundry. I'll do it later after everyone in this house sudah mandi apa, so tak balik2. Heh.

Anyway, I went out with Vivi and Elza earlier. Another last minute plan. Hehe. We didn't go far. Just had afternoon snack at OG Complex, dvd shopping and beach-ing. Hehe. Anyway, I took a break from my so called diet tadi. Haha. I had cucur Keladi, Udang, ABC, lekor and Elza treated me with Ahad's burger. And darn it, I am so full. Alhamdulilah. Haha. I'm so not going to eat anything tonight. Apart from chocs of course. Heh. Oh yeah, di pantai tadi Vivi and me main pijak2 kaki and bagi sand. Haha. I don't know how to describe it. Just a lil childish game we played. Haha. I bought another dvd tadi. Ben10, I bought it for Waie actually and I will watch it when I feel like doing so. Later I'm so going to watch the dvds that Elza and Vivi lend to me ;) After I'm done with laundry of course.I'm gonna drink nescafe later. Lol.

What else? Ahh, just another piece of mind. Heh. Lol. See, life, at least mine and my family's, is inevitable from ironies and distrust. Haha. I mean not between me and my mom and siblings literally. Heh. Just wanna clear my perspective, I so don't want to hear or know the others point of view of how fair or bias we have been treated. Just don't bloody fill us in with siapa jahat or baik. Tengok cermin dulu and ask wisely, have you never truly taken the slightest advantage on us? Insya Allah I know who my real family are. :) Those who thinks of only good things for us. And who have been there for us through susah sanang. I welcome newcomers easily and once I regret it, it is termination. I already feel disgusted on some of them. Annoying suckers:) and do not ever say I care that much for their children, because I never really do,well some I do,the baik and ikhlas ones of cuz. Lol. Frankly speaking :) don't talk rubbish so that I would trust you more than I do on the others. FYI, I don't trust you, almost. Heh.
And be greatful when I'm changing the subject. As I said, sendiri buat pandai2 lah tanggung. :)

Anyway, I'm not mad. Boring saja. :p okay then, till next post. Salam. Nite2.

P/s: I'm 20 yrs and a month old today. Haha

I am hoping, I am! O.o

2009-12-07T10:48:00.001Z

I just had my Maghrib prayer and somehow my head is a bit palau. A kind of palauness that I am quite familiar with nowadays due to my unhealthy pattern of sleep. Heh. Whatever. At least I did wake up earlier today. I needed to make payment on house&sampah at District Office. I then went to HSBC and then Taib to simpan monthly savings for my siblings and my account.

At 120ish pm I took off to Kiarong for an interview at Baiduri. I was the last one. There were four of us, and I know one of them. She's my junior in SMSB. The other two were from MD and they are nice. The guy Firdaus, he reminds me of someone. The way he talks and behaves is just almost as same as Zaim Jbu. Hehe. Less annoying though. Haha. Anyway,the interview was okay. It was fun. At least they like me. Lol. They did. The girl one said 'I love her already' and the other interview said 'You're interesting'. Okayy, I did get flattered with these butttt still I just want to be sure that I'd get the job. Huhu. The interview went okay but then I have my doubts. I mean it is wise not to expect too much right? Damn it, I want the job! :/ and anyway, I'll just wait and be ready for any outcome. Pfff.

What else? Hmm, on this coming Friday Elza and I are going to have a lunch with some of the Jbu babes. Elza planned to give a surprise visit to the office and I am still thinking whether to join her on the surprise part or not. There are few faces that I don't feel like seeing. And anyway, me turning up there might just lead to awkwardness and hypocricy on some party. Lol. Whatever. :)

Alright, I'd stop now. Wanna continue rereading breaking dawn on my laptop. I slept at 3 am because of it tadi. Lol. Have a good time people x)

Blurghh

2009-12-04T19:58:00.000Z

It is almost 4 AM already. I do think that my mind is tired but I just don't feel like sleeping yet and yes I hate this. I wanna start getting an early sleep and wake up early the next morning. I just do not know when will I get myself doing that. Blurghh. Okay, enough complaining.

I went out with my friends earlier to watch New Moon and well, New Moon is indeed superb compared to Twilight, for me at least. Jacob Black is hot, yes he is indeed hotter than Edward. Lols. The movie lasted for 2 hours plus. After watching the movie, we went to eat ice cream and I agree with Cqen that place is nice. it is quite cool. The ice cream was nyaman. =) There were 20 of us kali tadi, Sheikh joined us tadi and his hyperness is just as charming as ever. lol. We went back home at around 11 ish. Oshin gave me a ride to Bukit Beruang while my sister and Farah ikut Elza. Qens was supposed to sleepover at my house. Sorry babe=)We will the sleepover next time. Hehe. I had a good time talking to Oshin tadi on the way home tadi. =)

Alright, I feel like doing random talking. lol. Heh. But nehh, better go to bedddddd~

Night people.

Pre-Outing.

2009-12-02T11:09:00.001Z

Heyy,it's 6.20pm and somehow my head aches a bit. Heh. I think I need to adjust my sleep pattern. I slept at 6ish am this morning and woke up at 11ish and at around 2ish I took a nap lagi. Hah. Sleepless nights. Lol.

Anyway, I went out with cQen,Elza and Vivi yesterday. We wanted to book the New Moon's tickets. We went to Empire initially only to know the schedule isn't out yet,not till today. We went to the Mall and booked tickets di sana instead. So, we will watch New Moon at Mall on Friday, 7 pm. :))

We watched Senario last night and went to arcade. Qens and me main a game kajap and we had 6 karaoke songs. Heh. It felt like forever that I hadn't gone out and had fun. ;)

Qens sleptover at my place last night, and we watched two movies last night, Imagine That and the ghost of girlfriends' past. Both movies were okay, especially the latter one. Hehe. After dvd-ing,we talked and talked till 6 ish am. :p

Oh yeah, last night, I accidentally 'over boiled' water. Haha. Nasib cQens tercium bau hangus. Heheh. Careless~

Eh, I gtg. Till here then. Hehe. Good night people.

P/s: umm,badan ku naik bnr and reli,bek tah jaga2. Haha. Lol

December comes

2009-11-30T17:09:00.001Z

Goodbye November. Here comes December. The last month of the year. One more month for a new year. A month to think back of what we have gone through the years and spend a lil more time with beloved ones. A month of holiday,well for most people. Haha. Okay, what's with the December stuffs? Lol. Heh. But anyway, they are true though:)

Okay,enough crapping. Lol. I feel good. Hehe. I was feeling rather weird today. An obvious-not-happening dream I had last night somehow affected my mood the whole day. I got moody and tense. One of my weirdest dreams. Not talking much bout it, I might find it hard to stop and would feel that weird tingly feeling again. And there was another thing too that makes me feel somehow torn into two, torn between my own selfishness and self-less-ness. And well, I have not truly made up my mind about it. Lol. I know you are pretty much lost to read this paragraph and well, I don't feel like telling in details. Mostly due to my weakness at summarising. Lol.

Something else now, ahh, my written test, it was okay. It was an hour and 30 mins test. 30 mins for each paper. First paper was 60 English mcQ quest,then essays and questions on Maths. I managed to do them within the time given. I hope I did okay on those papers :) oh yeah, Ramizah was one of the candidates tadi. We were quite surprised to see each other. Hehe. She sat next to me during the test.

Oh, I just remember Uncle Din texted me tadi asking me to go to Tuition place pasal a student wanted to makd payment. Oh well,obviously I was not available to do that. :/

What else? Ahh, I am having a pre outing with Vivi,Elza and Qens tomorrow. Hehe. A last mins and spontaneous plan. Haha. I'm bringing mamai along tomorrow since I think my sis would find it hard to handle those two kiddos if I am going later afternoon. Hehe. We will go and book New Moon tickets and then bejaur. X)

okay, enough talking. Till next post then. Nite.

Should I or shouldn't I watch dvd now? Lol.

Blogging again! :p

2009-11-29T15:43:00.001Z

Hello~Salam, I'm blogging again. Haha. Okay, I now seriously think that I actually have a multiple personality disease. Haha. Nauzubillah. I'm just pretty much flactuate,that is all. Plus I always feel good after I do my daily duty as a Muslim. Not exaggerating or showing off, it is just simply true:)

Heh, anyway I am repetitively listening to few songs at the moment. All the right moves, Fireflies, SOS, Good girls gone bad, Bad Romance and Dancing Queen. :p Somehow they are addictive. :p

Okay, tomorrow afternoon I'll do a written test at Baiduri bank. And part of me kata, it would be easy squeezy lemon squeezy- do I get this phrase right? Lol- and yet part of me kata 'do not take things for granted'. Plus my aunt and mom asked me earlier should not I be revising for it? Heh. Yes, they are right, I should and here I am with some maths questions. Haha. The basic ones. I just hope I can do it tomorrow. ;)I'll look through few things later.

What else? Ahh, outings with friends would be on 4th Dec, I think so it is confirmed already. Hmm,anyway, we will be watching New Moon and I have a feeling it is way better than Twilight. Well, better do not expect high though. :) and the next friday, on 11th, Insya Allah Elza and me will meet Dls girls-well some only,lol-. We will have lunch and take photos at arcade? Heh. Hopefully. :p

Ummph, I think I'd stop now. Till next post then. A very good night to you all:)))

The resentment is still there and ignoring it is the best and ideal response. :P.

Not so bright post.

2009-11-29T14:26:00.001Z

Hey, salam. Hello peeps. Hmm, I'm not feeling pretty much hyper or positive at the moment. Just few silly things pop up in my mind and somehow make me a bit upset and moody.

Generally, I hate buggers. I am not a saint, no obviously I'm not and yet I'm not that cruel or bitchy or sort. It's just, when I got angry I barely contain my anger. I either hold it or burst out. I notice when a person has gone too far, I tend not only see salah nya. Other's mistakes and wrong doings would automatically play in my mind. That is sucks, frankly speaking. I got all tense and extra sensitive. I may say 'it's okay, let's just move on' and bla bla. But truthfully, what ever wrong doing one did to me,it is always there. Was,is and will be always there.

Anyway, I think I would just stop before I go on. Once out, I might find it hard to stop saying things. I better do prayers, that would certainly help. Insya Allah.

Good night then.

It's Saturday babehhh~

2009-11-28T10:40:00.001Z

Heyy, I am blogging again! Heheh. Usu just did some makeover to my hairs and yes I like it. Haha. I feel so inda panas. I am going to spend another night here, with my first sister this time, Yuhani that is. HEHE. And tell you something, I haven't got out from this house even for one second. haha. Bekurung banar. Hehe. We are pretty much jobless. Usu laki went to Miri earlier and now is on his way home. =)))

Nevertheless I like it here. Staying here gives me the pleasure of cuddling with the catsss. I spent my day doing few things to kill the time. I have endless chats with Usu Bini and have fun commenting on the Indonesian actors at Parabola. Haha.Okay, not meaning to sound bitchy or anything but how on earth can't any of those handsome, super duper hot guys are not in BRUNEI????? Haha. Be here and let me make one of you as my partner. Haha! Now that is gruesome. As if look is what matters a lot in relationship. Heh. What is the use of having a gorgeous look when he or she doesn't have what it takes to be an ideal partner? =))

Hehe. Anyway, since I was jobless tadi, I created an account on Twitter. And I immediately found that it is quite boring there, heh, maybe due to I haven't had any friends there. lol. So anyway, I then decided to register on Plurk. HAHA. I seriously like it. Or I actually getting myself in love and addicted with it. Haha. Lol.

What else? Heheh. I think I'd stop first. I have not had my Maghrib prayer. Hehe. So, till next post-which might be later=p, aha. Alright, take care of yourself dear people. hehe.

Oh yeah, I was waken up earlier this morning by Elza's message. Haha. Forwarding Bella's text for bowling outing. Hehe. She was not going since she has to do revision. And presumably I was not going too jua. Haha. Plus I am at Usu's cribs and feel very much 'lazy' to do anything. Heheh.

Okay, ciao! x))

Postt Post Post

2009-11-27T12:53:00.000Z

Heyy, Salam! :D I am at Usu's cribs at the moment. Mamai IS supposed to be here with me jua and apa nah,she cried and refused to come with me as soon as she saw Waie's NEW bicycle. Haha. Usu laki was like 'Pembuyuk'. HAHA. My sister is 'cute'. Tengok kakak die lerr. HAHA! Oh myy God, I am quite hyper now. Again, talking improves my mood=p Currently talking to usu and chatting with my dearest cuzie. hehe. And yes, I feel very much talkative. hehe.Anyway, I had a good time earlier afternoon with Vivi and Zar. Vivi and I had our lunch first at Ayamku before going to Zar's house. Hehe. And we bought some dvds earlier. *despite my vow not to buy any dvd yet, I got myself Rebound dvd! HAHA. Okay, I am officially a DVD addict. lol

We arrived at Zar's house at around 2 ish Though I promised her to be at her place around 1.30. Biasa, janji melayu=p Zar and Vivi helped me to change my blogskin apa. Anddddd I was seriously wrong to think changing blogskin stuff is a piece of cake. =pp I doubt I will do it expertly the next time I want to change my blogskin.Why? Cuz Vivi helped me a lot with that. Haha. Mcm my job was to pilih and decide whether the stuffs are okay or not. Haha. Vivi, my saviour=p Thanks a lot babe! and Zarifah tooo. Hehe. And talking about my blog too, Vivi even linked my blog with the Sci1 United babes. hehe. I did not think of it. I thought putting my URL on FB was just enough. =)

I seriously had good time at Zar's crib tadi. We had good laughs and talks. Haha. We talked about New Moon, books, their Uni lives, they fill me in with UBD stuffs and yes, I want to further my study. Learning is just a wonderful thing to be missed once we started working. lol. Oh yeah, talking about working, I received a call from Baiduri Bank this afternoon asking me to come for a written test on this Monday afternoon. And I was like a bit nervous about it since I was not expecting any feedback that soon. Haha. Anyway, wish me luck. Hehe. There are two more banks that I wanna send my letter to, HSBC and Standard Chartered. Yeah, procrastinating again!

Hehe. Okay, till here. Gonna have my dinner. Or should I say say gonna get more kgs and calories? Hahah. Goodnight people!

Late bedtime post.

2009-11-26T18:00:00.001Z

Heyy, I'm blogging again. Lol. It is 10 mins to go to 2 am. Just finished watching Mama Mia. Haha. God, that movie is full of eccentric madness and drama. I have a good time watching it, fill me with laughter. Lol ;p I love musical movie best. ;)

I technically did nothing so productive today. Just the usual laundry and cleaning stuffs. Heh. And I started reading Movie Girl today and I have finished reading it today jua. Well I like the content. The ending..well it's just quite too simple.*as if things are that wonderfully easy, practically. Lol. Tomorrow I will start reading another book lagi. Heh. I can feel myself getting into books and dvds now. And I supposed that explains my lazy mood to go out and get snappish whenever someone or something interupts me while reading.

What else? Ahh, I watched G.I Joe too before watching Mama Mia. And I enjoyed it. All in all I enjoyed watching both. :)
Hmm, I think I'd stop. My eyes are getting heavier. I wanted to blog bout some other random things but ngantuk dh. Good night people. Or morning,appropriately. Lol.

xoxo

Doing nothing soo productive somehow makes me snappish and yes I'd love to have a go on certain and specific selfish and shameless buggers at the moment. :)

Blog-blogging-blogger

2009-11-25T14:20:00.001Z

Salam, hello peeps. ;D. I'm currently listening to Miley Cyrus. This Party in the USA seriously makes me feel...umm,energetic? Haha. Lol. Makes me wanna moves along with it. Haha. Lol. Love the chorus part!:p

Anyway, I tried to change my blogskin earlier and well to no avail. Haha. I ended up having a minor headache. I was lost how to do it though Zar tried to guide me tadi. Hehe. *Thanks babe!

Earlier this afternoon I went to Bandar with my cousin, Yazid, to send my SPA2 form. And yeah, he's not the type that talk a lot and it was me who did all the talking for most of time. At first we were so quiet masa on the way. I was way too sleep to think of any subject to talk about. Lol! ;p Anyway, we went to the Mall for a while after that. I wanted-or I thought so-to get myself some cappucino. Heh. Anyway, I ended up enjoying my ABC than the cappucino. Toooo bitter and coffee-ish. Lol. X) And and I bought dvds,again. Heh. Mom isn't happy with my sis and my endlessly-buying-dvds habit. Toink~ I don't know why but somehow I feel that I need to keep 'topping up' my dvds. Haha. Telur. There are several dvds I am planning to get soon. ;)

What else? Ahh, I am currently reading a book. The Balance Thing by Margeret Dumas. Hehe. And I rate it 3 stars la. I like the main character. She sounds like someone that I know very well. Lol *inside joke. And I am sure I will finish reading it after this. Hehe. Just few chapters and I so want to know how Rebecca-a date lazy who's afraid of commitment,increduleously oblivious to guys' attempts to build relationship with her- gets herself involved with Josh-a vampire cartoon drawer,incredibly attractive and a bit too good to be true guy. Haha. Okay, what a tangled statement;p

Alright, I guess I'd stop here. Till next post then. Hehe. Goodnight people.

xoxo

p/s: Not over the crush but know well how to deal with it. :)

Pa Ra Pa Pa

2009-11-23T17:38:00.001Z

Haha. A title out of boredom. Lol. Heh. I just had 2 hours phone call with Awg. Najerry earlier. Heh. Like after how many months ka we didn't really talk to each other through the phone. I even barely see him this year :)

The phone call was okay and quite nice. We got to joke like we used to. And I notice and a bit proud that I know how to bls teases nya. Haha. Lol. I used to be bullied and nda pandai bnr cri jwpn x time dulu2 if kana naya and he mentioned something like 'kenapa tia kau pyh kn mengalah ni?'. Lolss. Anyway, will see him somewhere in Dec-I repeated that few times tadi and included 'aku malas and nada rasa kn jmpa siapa2 bulan November ne'. Lols. Heh. Not that I really mean to dismiss people or apa in a rude way but then nth.. I just can't really feel the excitement of going out...yet. Except for New Moon of course. Heh.

Anyway, I just start reading a book tadi. I wanted to read Movie Girl initially and later switched to Balance things. Hehe. Both books seem enjoyable to me. I am not entirely focussed yet since I have some minor tasks to be done. I haven't sent both my SPA/2 form
and the letters stuff yet. And I need to go to Pejabat Buruh tomorrow since my buruh card expired dah and I totally was not aware of it till mom asked me tadi*typical.

Ummph, what else? Ahh. I think till next post then. If I am to get at least few things done tomorrow I better go to bed now. Goodnight people.

p/s: It seems preferable to keep a sensible distance just to avoid awkwardness:)

Hush hush.

2009-11-22T14:00:00.002Z

I am feeling quite gooddd. Hehe. I'm done with the letter thingy. I just need to fill in SPA/2 form after this :) and then I can do things that I wanna do. Haha. Games/DVDs/Story books that is. I think I'm gonna have a peek at my Insaquarium game for a while. Lama inda check my fish pets:p

Anyway, New Moon is coming soon and I have been hoping that it would be my first outings with my dearest friends. :)

I think I'm just gonna stop here. This is the shortest post so far, as I am aware of. Lol. I just feel good that I at least got a task done this time. Hehe. Cleaning and packing, mom says we will just start doing it once school holidays start ;) that suits me just perfectly.

Feeling utterly bliss:)

Good night.

xoxo

Sundayyy

2009-11-22T04:54:00.001Z

Beautiful Sundayy!!*attempting a big smile. Haha. Aku boring. And I know I got books and dvds to occupy me butttt I just won't feel right to leisure and pamper myself when I know there is a number of things to be done. First, letter stuffs and start packing. Haa. Aku malas. But then it just doesn't feel right to ignore the fact that I need to get things done :s

So at least I need to get started with letters stuffs and do a bit clean up. And then yes I'd pretty much deserve my own time for books and dvd. Been craving to do these two things. Heh.

Till next post then. Pretty much feeling tense. Lol.

Oh yeah, so loving the song Good Girls Gone Bad. It somehow makes me feel that it is okay not to be self dicipline at times. For eg,it is okay to procrastinate and be lazy. Haha. Not! Lol. Off.

xx

Wheel.

2009-11-20T17:14:00.001Z

Wheel of life, up and down,roller coaster and what else? Pasang surut? Yeah,anything would do. Anyway, I just suddenly feel not so happy with certain things. I am not going to ellaborate much. Just seriously, do not play with one's emotions. It sucks. Do not give hope and hurt one's heart in any possible way. Huhu. I just feel unfair ja. I've been through pains,betrayals and etc and it just makes me a bit angry to see the same things happen to people I know. People that I care about. :/.

Anyway, positive side, there's a first time before 'more' things are coming. Pains,betrayals and losts just one of the negative phases we need to go through in lives. So chew that up. :)

And to whom it may concern, no need to feel down, the right one or thing would turn up sooner or later. :)

Okay enough negative rambling. :)

Me and my sis got to see our soon to be house earlier pm. And well the house is okay. Just need some clean up. And I'm not sooo eager to do that. :s

hmm,anyway, I ended up doing practically NOTHING today. Nothing went according to plan. I did not do any of the things that I have mentally listed. Oh ada, going to my dad's grave and going out with my mom and sister. I even forgotten to go to the Saloon and ask how much hair touch up would cost me. *looking for $50 and below only. Heh.

What else? Hmm, nothing x. Till next post then. Gud nite.

xoxo

p/s: will read and reply comments tomorrow;)

Paradiseeeee <3

2009-11-20T06:24:00.001Z

Hello peeps. Salam. Hehe. I officially finished my exam today. And I can officially pamper myself and live in my own world. Haha. Not. I was exaggerating and I am not to have my 'paradise' the way I wanted it to be. Lol. Not so soon anyway. Hehe. I need to get few things done asap and I need to start assist my mom doing packing up and that includes packing up my stuffs too. Like as soon as possible since we are to move out soon or to be specific before next year. We eventually got a house to rent, Alhamdullilah and just need to clarify few things and we shall start moving out our stuffs. Moving to new house, I kinda look forward to it but packing things up and moving them out of the house, now that is something I am not quite looking forward to. Haha. Anyway, our soon to be house is located at Penanjong, near to Tutong Camp gate. Hehe. It is green in colour and I hope the owner would kindly repaint the house before we move in. =)))

I thought I have lots to say but when I come to blogging I am just quite blank. Haha. Not so in talkative mood I guess. Heh. Just random things, I wanna get extra money so I don't have to think whether to do a touch up for my hair or not. *been debating with myself whether I should or not. Haha. I wanna buy story booksssss, I wanna buy dvds. And I wanna watch You're Beautiful. Haha. Random. Anyway, You're beautiful, yeah, perhaps I am just really going to wait for the DVD and get it as soon as it is out. Heh. Let see whether tomorrow I will or not watch it on Vikii.com while sleeping over at Usu's cribs. Maybe inda kali since we plan to watch 2012 at their home theater TV set. And moreover I bet I will be occupied with the 'kiddos'-Victoria, Francee, Kubert, Edmund, Wolf and Yellowkit. Hee. I miss them!

Bah, till next post I guess. I could not recall the things that I wanna share here at the moment. Lol. Good day.

xoxo

p/s: HAPPY 29TH MONSARIES TO ADVV- a pair of kambings who I love and love me back dearly. hahaha

Caffein. <3

2009-11-17T12:15:00.002Z

Heh. I love nescafe. Haha. Lol. I'm gonna drink some after this. Quite sleepyy and would pretty much need that to keep me awake, not to mention hyper? Haha. Okay, I'm getting hyper.:P. I should be focussing on my Literature stuff instead of blogging but then I just want to blog. As I said yesterday, talking is one way to improve your mood. :P.

Anyway, my biology tadi? Kambing lah. P2 was okay. The questions were quite simple and topics yang came out pun yang not so difficult on. Which I'm half-ly grateful with and the other half felt kambing a bit pasal I slept at 5 just to hafal kan the heart thingy,protein sythesis and transport in mammals & plants. Toink. Sleepy ku yo~:p And P5? Jangan tah ckp, bg mental mcm biasa. Heh. Ada proving which aku balik2 takan2 calculator but ended up with nothing. Oh yeah ada lagi satu. P2 ah, I confidently changed my answer from 'channel' to 'carrier' proteins for Calcium ions transport membrane. Like....kambing.

Heh. Okay, what else? Ah, I'm gonna put this blog url on my fb profile. So I am finally 'exposing' this blog:) People are welcome to read my endless talking. Haha! Feel free to judge or criticise but do keep your judgements and critics to yourself. Low self esteem ku krg. Haha. Godddddd, why am I so hyper?

Bah. I'm off. Tada~ till next post. Salam;)

p/s: i miss talking to you dude. Currently listening to one of the songs in ur playlist. Anyway, I'm not 'getting' you back. That is easy to be accepted. :)

off to get nescafe and chocssss:) -love the endless storage of chocs in my house. Haha. Lol.

Go Yuh Go!

2009-11-16T12:09:00.002Z

Haha. I was like pissed off just now. And now I get my good mood back after chit chatting with Farah. Talking is certainly one way to improve your mood. Heh. Lol. Anyway I was tense earlier because I could not find my Granny's watch I borrowed last month for exam. I kept on forgetting to return it back to her and well, it goes missing now. That is very very typical. Lol.

I was looking for my printer installer CD few days ago,and I could not find it too. So tadi, I just decided a little clean up and pack up might be right. Buttttt, I got tense instead. I went through my things tadi and I came across with my journals and I reread through some and well, missing things and misplacing things is just sooo me. Haha. Thanks to that 'encounter' too that I decided to stop going through my things and Farah came at the perfect time to lighten up my mood a bit. Heh.

Anyway, five more papers to go- Bio P2 & P5: tomorrow, Eng. Lit P5-18TH, Eng. Lit P6-19th and Chem P1- 20th. Hehe. Do my very best okayyy.*Insya Allah. :))) This is going to be the last time I'm taking exam. Amiinnn x40:) And I've made up my mind, yeah again, I want to further my study. I know I said I want to get a job and take care of family, well I was not being quite sensible and rational at that time:) Mom wants me to continue my study and yes, I wanna be there too, with my dearest friendsss. That is what I want. :)))

What else? Ahh, just a immediate-things-to-do list once exam is over. Heh.
+Pack up my things, clear up every things+
+Find the so-called missings+
+DVD shoppings+
+Watch dvds+
+Story books+

Heh. Bah, till next post. Get going with revision Yuh.

Oh yeah, I love Miley Cyrus's songs. Well, most. Heh 'Nodding my head like yeah, moving my hips like yeah~'. Haha.

Dada~

xoxo

Friday, the 13th.

2009-11-13T12:15:00.001Z

Hehe. Hi again~ Last night I saw someone's status on FB saying something like those who believe that Friday with a date 13th is a bad luck are just being illogic. I think that person said something like 'No logical explanation for such belief'. Heh. Well, I kinda not prefer the number 13 saja. Not that I really believe such nonsense. Just..out of habit I guess;)

I had my second English Literature paper this afternoon and well, I hope my essays are not so troll. I chose Twelfth Night and A View from the Bridge. I did not expect Twelfth Night to come out in the paper tadi and I just answered based on my learning and memory back in few months ago and the last two years. I chose the passage question, extracted from Act 1 Scene 5. The question was 'What is your point of view with the following scene, paying more attention to how William Shakespeare presents Viola and Olivia'. =) The second essay I did was 'Based on the following scene, what is the dramatic significance of Alfieri first encouter with Eddie?'. And honestly I enjoyed doing the second essay ta plg. Hehe. Well, I just did not expect Twelfth Night to come out wa, I thought masuk paper 5. Huhu. Lol!

Anyway, I already tagged some of my birthday pictures taken by Farah on FB. =) What else? Ahh, just random. And oh yeah, self reminder, Keep the positive aura and avoid going to negative path. Haha. Telur. Nothig just reminding myself=DDD

Okay, I think till next post =DDD Good night.

xoxo

p/s: I might just get the DVD of ur Beautiful. boring ku liat putus2. haha. lol. I heard from my cousin, it is getting interesting!!!! =D

Doveyyy~

2009-11-11T15:48:00.000Z

I am at my Usu's crib and it is 11.30 PM already. And yes my eyes are a bit tired but I just don't feel like going to bed early tonight. I ought to, thinking I had less and less sleep for the past few days. lol. Typical lah, exam period. lols.

I had Chemistry paper 4 early this morning and the questions were mostly okay but again I am just not clever or good enough to work out all the answers within the time given. ;sss So yeah, there were a number of blanks and I am quite frustrated with that fact. lol. Okay, what done is done. Just focus on coming papers! :))) On coming Friday I'd have my second English Literature. Heh. I thought I'd do the paper tomorrow. lol. Heh. Anyway, I am going to accompany my usu tomorrow morning to bring my Grandma to JPMC for appointment. So, I am certainly not waking up late later. :) But then I seriously don't feel like going to bed earlier either. I wanna watch You're Beautiful after this :))))

Hmm, what else?Heh, I don't have anything particular to blog about. I just want to blog for a while. Alright then, till next post. Good night people :)

xoxo

Beautiful 20:)

2009-11-09T16:31:00.001Z

It is two minutes before 12 am and by the time I'm done blogging it would be 10th Nov already. Hehe.

Anyway, I had a blast and wonderful times today! I seriously expected very little on this special day of mine. I thought it would have been the typical birthday with greetings via fb and hp. Hee. Not that I'm not grateful. I am indeed. Having people remembering your birthday, that is good enough:) And I just could not ask more for today. And forgive me to admit I am quite exhausted from wonderful surprises and the happy lovey dovey feelings. Haha.

Okay, first, as usual, ever since form 4, Elza was the first to greet me last night. The first five minutes greet-ers were her, my sis, Vivi, Farah and my Usu. I didn't realize my credit was low last night and I decided not to read their texts. Hehe. I wanna bca and reply trus. And I only read their messages with some other people early this morning. And, yes, I simply love them!:) Thanks again. X)

Then at around lunch time Usu came over to my place. And I didn't even realize usu bini brought a cake. I did predict my mom would buy Ayamku for lunch but didn't see that a mini makan2 would be held. Haha. That was when my first 'smiling' emotions came. Heh. Lol. It was simply wonderful to have my family doing that for me:) Esp my beloved cousin, for the cake. Though she's not here, she made sure I have my cake;D

And so I thought the birthday stuffs ended there. But not really, late at the afternoon my mom gave me two things. A photo frame for six pictures-ngam, mine would be in the middle one and the rest of my family's would be in the other five. Haha- and a jewellery box-a good one since my accesories selalu ampai2:p-. So again I thought that was the end. Haha. Lol. I seriously expected less for this 20th birthday!

And I went to kadai kajap td and sent my sister and Farah to the easyway. Konon. I didn't suspect a thing. Haha. They didn't go there and went to buy a cake actually. I didn't even get suspicious when they went home earlier and said easy way 'nada wireless'. Haha.

And at around 7 pm when I was about to take my wudhu and have my Maghbrib prayer, Farah's mom came and insisted to see me. That was weird but again I simply thought she wanted to give me something. So I was tekajuttt tahap maksima to see Ilham, Elza, Addie, Vv and Farah with two cakes. That hit the button,okay. I cried out of surprise and happiness! Seriously I didn't expect to see them today! Vivi and Elza gave me a beautiful kain which I will potong when I lose some weight. Haha! We took some pictures. Eham would upload them in fb soon ;)

The whole thing didn't stop there. When I was all tired but happy I received a surprise call from Pelangifm. Farah requested that. And really, I just had a number of great surprises that all I wanna do was smiling and tell whoever wants to listen that I am blissfully happy!;)

Hehe I'd stop now. Till next post. Thanks for the greetings and wishes. And importantly I thank Allah for today. ;)

xoxo

Last few hours.

2009-11-08T14:02:00.001Z

Yeah, the last few hours before I'm turning into 20.. And I feel like it was yesterday that I was still 12-15 years old,wondering how would I be like on the age of 20. And I don't know.

I'm not excited. No, that doesn't mean I am being all negatives. Lol. I used to get so excited when my birthday is coming but this time, somehow and weirdly, I am not looking forward. Lols. Few people greeted me in advance and I was like 'heyy guys, let 8th Nov pass by first and you are welcome to greet me'. Lols. Demanding and ungrateful much eh? No, nada lah. I'm happy okay and grateful enough to have people remember my birthday and to receive greetings from people. ;))) And another thing, I tend to 'hint hint' my family-as if they are not aware-that my special day is coming close and ironically I got a bit annoyed when my sister teases me with birthday songs and 'getting old' stuffs. Haha. Doing the slightest best to ignore her. ;p

hmm, what else. Ahh, zar came over to place earlier to pick up Paranormal Activity dvd. She stayed for a while and she filled me in with stuffs. And seriously I'd better rajin kan myself read newspapers or any reading source to get updated with current news and issues. :/ Oh yeah, the dvd, it's not 'fun' but is surely something. Hehe. I don't know how to summarise it but if you want you can always borrow mine:)

At night, Syazwan,Qayyum and Zaim came over. Syazwan said Zaim wanted to borrow my Paranormal Activity. Idk. I didn't focus:) Ummph, they stayed for quite a while. Talked a lot to Syazwan. He reminded me about our outing in December:) Yeah, batah sangat inda outing with ia. And moreover, I owe him Jollibee treat;)

What else? Ahh, cqen finally texted me. Telling me that she is okay. Hehe. Will reply her later or tomorrow. Insya Allah will top up tomorrow:)

I think I'd stop here. Till next post then. I want to revise biology MCQ. Goodnight.

xoxo

:)

2009-11-06T14:31:00.003Z

Hola, Salam peeps:) I'm quite sleepy at the moment and I put on Paranormal Activity dvd just now. Two friends told me that it is scary, well, my comment so far, it is pretty much boring. Lol. Or maybe the 'ghosts' and the other creepy part would appear later on. Heh.

Anyway, I had my first english literature paper today. Poetry and Prose that is. Andd well, none of the poems and passage/books are taken from the books I focussed on. And well, I just did my best writing the essays. By luck, I hope it would not be sooo troll. Lols. Next paper would be on 10th, biology mcq.:) so yes, if this paranormal dvd turns to be boring to tolerate with, I'd just end up having a date with bio book. Worthwhile lagi. Lols:)

Oh yeah, yesterday I met Elza up to give her last salary at Ahbab and she treated me at Jollibee. Hee. *Thanks for the treat babe* Then we went to the beach kajap. It had been a while we didn't go to Pantai. Eh, wait, a while I didn't hang out with her. Not just her, Vivi jua. :) sabar, lapas exam for sure outings! Haha.

Ummph, what else? Ahh, I haven't heard from Cqen. And just now I sent a text to her. Hopefully she is getting okay by now. She is tough, but then, sakit wah tu... Huhu.

Hmmph, okay then. Till next post. Salam and goodnight:)

Lalala~

2009-11-05T02:41:00.000Z

I'm being quarantined! Lols. I had my biology practical just now. Anddd I just could not wait to get out of here. Boringgg wa. I hope I'd be out by 10.30 instead of 10.45. Heh. Okay, let me mumbling for the sake of 'killing' the time. Lols.

I met Miruz earlier, before my practical started and we had a nice brief chat:) Though we are not close buddies, but yes, I miss her indeed. She is fun to be with. ;) Oh yeah, I forgot to tell her about this blog aa. I'd love to let her know. Haha. And I forgot to ask for passwords to access her blog:P. Eheh.

Hmmph, okay. I'm hungry. Haha! I didn't have breakfast td;s. Anyway, last night I kinda expected that I'd wake up late and feel terribly sleepyy. But surprisingly no. Haha. I slept at 2 x last night. I chatted with elza and mr amir on msn. Haha. And and I was talking to usu bini jua:P.

Oh yeah, last night I watched movie 'The Tournament' with usu laki. Like I am having exam today but we ended up watching dvd ta plg. Haha. It is something unusual pasal usu laki yg bwa liat. Heh. He is normally strict;) anyway the dvd was okay, a brutal and killing type of movie. I was like 'eww', 'damn,putus tgn nya','shit,melatup kepalany' and etc etc. Haha. Forgive the not so nice usage of words;p

Okay, we are going out of this chemistry lab at 10.45 after all. Lol. 3 mins the go. By the time I publish this post I shall be out dh x. Toink.

Till next post then. Caio. Salam ;)

It's random again.

2009-11-04T17:57:00.000Z

Salam and hello peeps :) I am at my usu's crib. I have my Biology Practical exam tomorrow morning. I was supposed to sleepover alone but at the last minute I managed to persuade my family to join me. Eheh. I somehow missed the cats so much and yes I am glad to be here. =)) Mom said something like 'Nda kau tebelajar kan d cni'. Well, I agree with that. I was trying to focus tadi but I felt incomplete without having any kittens around, so I took Francee with me. And what she did was playing around with my pencil. haha. And that obviously distracted me. =p But somehow I loveee that kind of distraction;)

Okay, enough rumbling about catsss. heh. Let talk about my exam earlier today. Statistics was...ummm...no comment. lols. Chem P2 was so so and Chem P5 was surprisingly not so difficult. Heh. It wasn't so easy but I felt good after the exam. That was a good thing right? =p

Hmm, what else? Hmm, Idk. At this very moment my feeling and emotions are at ease but then back in few hours ago and some time yesterday, I was feeling...not at ease and a bit annoyed. Today something just nags me and I just want to get over that matter. It wasn't a big deal and it just annoys the hell out of me that some parties make it sound like something 'big'. Moreover I am not in the mood to deal with things at the moment, especially for unnecessary things. :) In a way I am willing to do anything just to settle it out. Heh. Anyway, things happen for reasons, don't they? =)

I think I'd better stop. Till next post then. Salam:)

xoxo

Bla bi va da

2009-11-03T10:44:00.001Z

Lols. I just woke up from my nap and yes, I'm not feeling quite good. First, I am getting fever. Ahh, that would certainly 'assist' my revision progress. And secondly I was pretty much upset with people in general before taking my nap. And with this throbbing head, I still feel like 'du uh,whatever'.

Okay, I am rather pissed off with some 'party' at the moment. I don't want to talk in details since I don't know where to start. Basically a person or shall I say a family? Lol. Anyway, they agreed to rent their house to us at the first place. We signed agreement and now they told us they did jadi sewa the rumah to someone else. Like. Du uh. Telur bnr.. And my mom received a memo td that we need to give,urgently, a picture of the house that we want to rent to Pejabat Ugama if we want Baitulmal pay half for it. Sasak lah ku. So we just told the truth lah. And that guy said 'mana boleh tu, pasal awal2 udah bejanji besurat kan'. Haa. You go and tell that to them mister.

Other things, hmmph. Malas ku ckp. I better take shower apa. And get started with revision.

Till next post then. Salam.

First post in Nov.

2009-11-02T08:01:00.001Z

My mom is going homeee. Yeay! Ahah. Lol. She was admitted to Ripas yesterday's afternoon due to pain at her tommy area. Now I'm waiting for her to change her clothes and we'd be off:D.

Anyway, my cousin left for Manchester yesterday and that was our first time not sending her off. She was worried bout my mom.. Yala, from friday dh she felt that painful pain. Huhu. I'd see my cousin in two months time anyway. X)

What else? Ahh, I visited qen's last night. My mom was in ward 7 and she's in ward 9. And I think her surgery is postponed to tomorrow.. :) Hope she'd be fine, amiin:)

Okay then,till next post:) salam.

Last Night's outing.

2009-10-31T04:08:00.001Z

I'm just going to keep this post short and simple. Heh. Lols. I had my last Salsa class yesterday afternoon and bless me, yesterday's salsa was quite 'brutal'. Haha. I was expecting for Hush Hush song and the robotic dance buttt nehh all of the songs were latin ones. Toink;p

Anyway, I went home earlier since I needed to take shower and get ready for the last minute outing planned by me and my dearest cousin. Lols. Waie is staying there and he mentioned to my cousin that he wanted to watch 'wayang'. And and I did think kn bwa ia dulu but na prnh sampai. So last night just sound nice to me:) And we were not so hoping too much that yazid would want to drive us k bandar. Hehe. But then surprisingly, sanang. I do think we are getting close somehow. Yala, kami semua perempuan. Except ia and waie. Mcm nada kwn ya sma kami:)

We arrived at Mall at 8ish. Waie wanted to watch Ninja so the rest of us ikut saja. The outing was for him actually:) We had dinner first and went to the cinema at 9.30pm. The movie wasn't so bad. So-so. I'm not into ninja thingy. Heh.

Oh yeah, twilight: New Moon's premier would be on the 3rd Dec. :D and and there is a horror movie I want to watch, Phobia 2. Looks way scarrier. Eheh.

Anyway, we went home at around 11ish and my sis and I arrived at 12 x. Heh. So, thats it. Just as simple as that. We had good time though x)

Till next post then. Salam:)

Last Friday in Oct. ;)

2009-10-30T06:02:00.001Z

I was taking a nap just now and a text woke me up. Heh. And yes, my mata menyamal and my head is aching a bit. Lols. I'm not going to bed anyway. Mcm alang2. I got class 3. But then I have to print my aunt's CV lg and accompany my mom going to the bank.

I was wishing that I could have this afternoon time for myself. Heh. I felt so sleepy td. Yawning blik2. But now not anymore. Lols.

Anyway,last night, the gathering was okay. Abg anip with his parents and youngest sibling were there with us too. Anddd I watched Ur Beautiful smlm tp nada subtitle. So,buat buat fhm saja. Haha. Rasa. Butt thenn my cousin texted me td telling me she's watchng episode 8 with subs. Kambinggg. We were supposed to wake up at around 2 wa td to watch sama2. Aigoo. I have a 'crush' on dat drama now. Haha. Telur. :p and later I'm going to Salsa alone since she's still unwell. 1 week dh kami inda timbul2. Haha. My last salsa later. Will join Mrs.Goh in december ja lagi nanti:)

What else? Ahh, I had my kLip T-shirt. And I'm going to wear it later for aero. ;) it is quite a simple t-Shirt. I haven't really looked at it. Mr. Amir and I met up at Petani Mall for the T-shirt delivery. After meeting him, I just went home and reached my bed:) Anyway, we just met up for short moments. He was rushing to JP and I was extremely sleepy dh. Lols.

Okay then, its 2pm already and I better get up and print the CV and get ready for my class. Till next post then. Salam. :)